Attention tri-state area Red Sox fans:

We have a mission for you.  As you’ve heard, the daughter of Yankee owner George Steinbrenner is divorcing the former heir-apparent to the baseball empire, on the heels of his arrest for DUI. 

We need one of you to infiltrate this family. 

Your mission is to woo the daughter, and curry favor with the old man.  Kiss his sagging, speckled, hail-damaged, warty behind as often as possible.  Whisper words of encouragement into his ear, such as: “I always thought Dave Winfield was up to no good”, or “you know, that whole Watergate thing was totally overblown”.

Once you have earned his trust, our plan shall be nearly complete.  After the old man makes his inevitable descent into Hades, the control of the team shall be yours.  Now, the fun begins. 

* Scrap the new stadium plans.  Move the team to East Rutherford, NJ.
* The team needs a first baseman.  Give Rafael Palmeiro a call.
* The team needs some defense up the middle.  Trade Phil Hughes for Omar Vizquel, and move Robbie Cano for Kenny Lofton.  Throw in a few million to sweeten the pot.
* Those pinstripes are tired, don’t you think?  I like the 70’s rainbows a bit more.  Retro is in…get it done.
* Sign a declining 35-year-old pitcher for $16 million.  Whoops, already done.  Nevermind…good work.
* You know, I think those Red Sox are going to bid another $55 million for the posting rights for Kazumi Saitoh next season.  You should bid $100 million, just to be safe.

All right, I think we’re clear.  Anyway, remember, your first mission is to woo and seduce the daughter.  Here is a photo of her, she can be found in Tampa:

What’s that you ask?  Uh…she’s the one on the right.

What’s that?  Oh, stop complaining!  She’s rich.

Allow me to adjust my rose-colored glasses for a second.

As we approach Opening Day, practically every baseball-related website will be issuing their rankings and predictions for the 2007 season.  CBS Sportline is one of my personal favorite go-to websites for MLB analysis and news, and they issued their pre-season Power Rankings today. 

At #1 are the Boston Red Sox, closely followed by the Nyuk-Nyuks at #2.  Rounding out the top 5 are Detroit, the Mets, and Philly (the “east coast bias” camp should really appreciate this).

Of course, the other baseball heavyweights on the internet  (ESPN, CNNSI, Prospectus, ect…)  should be issuing their rankings soon, and could all disagree with the CBS ranking.

Still, it is somewhat refreshing to know that at least one high-profile site likes the Sox on paper, even with their question marks.

2006 Record: 80-82, 3^rd place, AL West

Projected Lineup:
1. CF Kenny Lofton
2. LF Frank Catalanotto
3. SS Michael Young
4. 1B Mark Teixeira
5. DH Sammy Sosa
6. 3B Hank Blalock
7. RF Nelson Cruz
8. C Gerald Laird
9. 2B Ian Kinsler

Projected Rotation:
Kevin Millwood
Vicente Padilla
Brandon McCarthy
Jamey Wright
Robinson Tejeda

Projected Closer:
Eric Gagne

Outlook:
This Texas Rangers franchise has been in a holding pattern for what seems like eons, plagued with the misfortune of playing in an uber-competitive 4 team division and consistently coming up short in September.  However, things have been trending upward for Ron Washington’s crew, as last year’s squad had a Pythagorean record of 86-76.  In addition to this, division rival Oakland might be nearing the end of their magic-carpet ride, and Seattle hasn’t done much to climb out of the cellar this offseason.  By default, Texas could be looking to pick up a few games in their division in 2007. 

The usual Achilles’ Heel down in Arlington is a lackluster starting rotation.  Now that the squad is no longer under the shadow of Chan-Ho Park and his abomination of a contract, GM Jon Daniels has focused on bringing quality, durable arms to the Lone Star State.  The most interesting guy in the rotation this year is Brandon McCarthy, acquired from Chicago in the John Danks trade.  What Texas did was trade a promising “almost-ready” pitcher for a promising “ready right now” pitcher, in the hopes of opening a window for contention.   After the 23-year-old was used primarily as a reliever in 2006, he will begin the season in the rotation.  Anchoring the rotation will be Kevin Millwood, who won 16 games and posted a 3:1 K:BB ratio in his Texas debut season.  It’s hard to believe that the big right-hander is only 32, because he’s been around for quite some time, providing conistent innings for the past decade.  Vicente Padilla is another solid workhorse, whose performance was nearly identical to Millwood’s in 2006. 

Along with McCarthy, another wildcard in the rotation is 25-year-old Robinson Tejeda.  The Dominican native does have potential, but will need to improve his control (career 4.7 BB per 9 innings) to stay out of trouble in the offense-happy Texas ballpark.  Veteran right-hander Jamey Wright is the favorite to begin the season as the 5^th starter.  Wright does have a knack for preventing the long-ball, which will come in handy in his new surroundings.  However, like Tejeda, he will need to keep the walks under control to avoid dangerous situations.

While the rotation looks to be somewhat improved in the wake of the John Koronka Era, Texas will once again boast a strong bullpen.  Of course, the highlight of the relief corps is a seemingly healthy Eric Gagne, who could prove to be a steal for Jon Daniels as the closer in 2007. 

Texas does have a bevy of other hard-throwing relievers who should be ready to step in if/when Gagne goes on one of his DL vacations.  Gagne will be treated with kid gloves, and a few save opportunities will likely go to last year’s closer, Akinori Otsuka, who dazzled the Dallas area with 32 saves and a 2.11 ERA in 2006.  RHP Frank Francisco (who is best known as the guy who smashed a female White Sox fan with a chair a few years ago) has been plagued by elbow problems since his Mick Foley impersonation, only throwing 7 innings since 2004, but does still have powerful stuff and could prove to be a solid set-up man once again.  Joaquin Benoit had impressive strikeout numbers in 2006 (9.6 per 9 innings), and will be counted on when the rotation can’t make it into the later innings.  Left-hander C.J. Wilson was murder on lefty hitters last season (.155 OBA), and former Red Sox Ron Mahay is still effective against hitters from both sides of the plate.  RHP Kameron Loe appears to be the loser of the spring 5^th starter battle, and will likely be used as a long/mop-up man.

The main strength of the Rangers (as always) will be their offense.  One of the biggest surprises of the spring has been the performance of a guy who was seemingly cast into baseball purgatory, Sammy Sosa.  Sosa has belted to the tune of .409/.426/.773 in spring training, and while Cactus League performances should always be taken with a heaping mound of salt, the legendary slugger certainly seems determined to go out with a bang, perhaps eradicating some of the negativity surrounding his rumored steroid use.

Along with Sosa, the Rangers infield will provide 4 decent bats for the middle of the order.  First baseman Mark Teixeira looks to improve from his “off” year in 2006, when he hit .282/.371/.514 while playing excellent defense. Teixeira actually had a 2^nd half surge last season (.998 post All-Star break OPS), and is a solid bet to be one of the most productive hitters in the AL in 2007.  At third base, Hank Blalock is also looking to improve in 2007, after playing hurt most of last season.  At age 29, All-Star shortstop Michael Young improved the one hole in his game last season: defense.  Young went from -15 FRAA in 2005 to +23 FRAA in 2006, while playing in all 162 games and smacking over 200 hits for the 4^th straight season.  Young second baseman Ian Kinsler is a potential 20 HR/20 SB guy, and with Young, should combine to form one of the best offensive middle-infields in the game.  Utilitymen Jerry Hairston Jr. and Matt Kata will serve as the primary infield backups. 

While the infield is stocked with powerful bats, the outfield picture isn’t nearly as bright, after the departure of the $100 Million Dollar Man, Carlos Lee.  Ancient speedster Kenny Lofton, whose primary skills are declining faster than the stock market, should see most of the starts in CF, with Brad Wilkerson backing him up (as well as playing the occasional 1B to spell Teixeira).  26-year-old Nelson Cruz is having a good spring, and will start in RF this season.  He does have potential, hitting .302/.378/.528 with 17 SBs in AAA Nashville, and could be a surprise producer in this lineup.  Red Sox killer Frankie Catalanotto will occupy left field, and should provide a solid top-of-the-order bat (career .362 on-base percentage).  The departure of Rod Barajas leaves longtime Texas backup Gerald Laird the starting catcher.  Laird hit very well in a reserve role in 2006, and can also provide a solid mitt behind the plate.  He’ll be backed-up by one of Chris Stewart and Miguel Ojeda this season (yet to be determined, as of this writing).

While the Texas pitching staff has improved and the infield is chock-full of young, promising stars, the team still has glaring weaknesses.  Unless Nelson Cruz breaks out, that outfield could be one of the worst in the league.  The catching corps is unproven, and the strong bullpen does have some serious injury risks.  This team will once again be looking at limbo, unless there are some miraculous comeback performances from DH and the bullpen.  Looking at the way certain guys are looking this spring, it certainly could happen.  This crystal ball shows a 2^nd place finish, and a pat on the back for new manager Ron Washington.

Prediction: 85-77.

2006: 67-95, Last in NL East

Lineup
2B Felipe Lopez (S)
SS Christian Guzman (S)
3B Ryan Zimmerman (R)
RF Austin Kearns (R)
1B Dmitri Young (S)
C Brian Schneider (L)
LF Ryan Church (L)
CF Alex Escobar (R)

Rotation
RHP John Patterson
RHP Jerome Williams
RHP Shawn Hill
LHP Matt Chico
RHP Jason Simontacchi

Closer
Chad Cordero

What a f*cking mess. The temptation to put “a bunch of bums” after John Patterson in the rotation was nearly too great to resist, and it would do as much to describe the drivel assembled here as their given names. The lineup is mildly terrible at best, Zimmerman is a good player but on any other team he’d be part of the supporting cast. Jim Bowden is like the studio exec that saw Mark Wahlberg in The Departed and decided that he could reprise his role as leader of the the funky bunch in “Shooter.” Well, he can’t carry a movie any better than Kearns and Zim will carry this offense.

If an “ace” is defined as the most talented pitcher on a team, Patterson qualifies. However, many believe that an ace must measure up to the elite of rotations across the league, if you’re of that school of thought Patterson is probably closer to Gil Meche than Brandon Webb. The strategy for filling out the rotation went something like this:

1. Collect inexperienced kids
2. Find a few journeymen with their tank just above empty
3. Audition everyone in spring training before hitters have their timing
4. Make a decision based on bad information
5. See who sticks in the bigs
6. Repeat

So the winners are Hill, Chico, and Williams. Simontacchi might miss some time with a strained groin, opening up the last spot for the struggling Tim Redding (16 H, 11 ER, 8.2 IP). Williams has the most experience, he started 17 games in 2005 with some success. While talented, he’s had as much trouble staying healthy as I have paying my Upper East Side rent. Hill has 9 career starts and Chico has never thrown a pitch in the bigs, so this rotation could be completely different two weeks into the season. They should shatter the record of 37 pitchers used by the 2002 Padres. I’ll put a sawbuck on the over, you game?

It looks like Nick Johnson might not play this season, creating a giant hole at first base. Don’t expect much from the 2007 version of Dmitri Young. How the mighty have fallen. It seems like just yesterday Dmitri was whimsically whacking some poor college kid in a bratwurst suit with a bat during the 5K sausage race in Milwaukee, today the former All-Star (albeit he was a Ken Harvey-esque selection) has dried out since his domestic violence charge last year. Apparently Dmitri had a little too much to drink and took out his frustration on his girlfriend. Its a good thing there are franchises like this to sponsor Dmitri Young during his rehabilitation, the Nats are like baseball’s halfway house. With all the uncertainty at first, someone like Larry Broadway might see significant time. He sounds like a cool guy and I bet he looks really boss in a leather jacket, but he’s never cashed in on his potential as a player. He’s in the right place at the right time, this team doesn’t care about his 116/45 K/BB ratio in AAA. For even more first base “depth,” Travis Lee has reappeared in Washington. When your veteran mentor couldn’t hang on the Devil Rays, you might start thinking about a new strategy for bench players. Hey, maybe Manny Acta can squeeze in some at bats for Robert Fick or Tony Batista! It isn’t called depth when none of the options are any good.

Roster flexibility is a product of foresight and usually makes a GM’s job easier. If there’s a little breathing room for a useful Rule 5 pickup thats always a nice boost to a farm system. However, there should never be enough room for TWO Rule 5 picks Jesus Flores will backup at catcher and Levale Speigner is in the mix for the starting rotation. Not even perennial Cy Young candidate Johan Santana was a starter as a Rule 5er. Jim Bowden is a pioneer in the poor roster management department. Has any team ever carried two 5ers for the duration?

Felipe Lopez had a nice season in 2006, and there’s little pressure on him this year. He’s part of the rare breed of hitters that have the same OBP(.362) as slugging (.365), also known as the Tony Womack All-Stars. Lopez is a serviceable leadoff guy and will steal bases every chance he gets with Cristian Guzman hitting behind him. Also an atypical hitter, Guzman has struck out 567 times in his career, while only drawing 191 walks and hitting 43 home runs. Basically, he doesn’t do anything right at the plate or in the field. He cost the Nats 13 runs on defense in 2005, his last full season, and makes $4.6m. He’s the clubhouse leader (in golf-speak) for the Angel Berroa Award as the worst regular in baseball after the namesake got demoted to AAA last week. Best of luck, Cristian.

The Kearns/Lopez deal was a rare stroke of Bowden genius. The relievers he sent won’t be missed this year and this team would be nothing without the offense he got in return. From all reports Bowden has attempted to pull the wool over some more eyes when unloading Chad Cordero; he is asking for numerous top prospects or major league ready players. Cordero’s stuff is questionable, over the last three seasons his WHIP and BABIP have been highly correlated. I’m sure this is true for most pitchers, but closers are generally not reliant on defense. He won’t get many opportunities to close games for this team, Bowden would be wise to trade him for whatever he can get.

As bad as the Jason Varitek contract looks right now, his one-time heir apparent, Brian Schneider, looked far more inept at the plate last year. Schneider’s $4m salary is no deal, but is the difference in slugging (.329 vs. .400) worth $6m? The trade talks involving Schneider were probably designed to manipulate Scott Boras through the media, but after the terms of Varitek’s contract were announced it was clear this strategy was ineffective. Schneider is praised for his defense and work ethic, certainly valuable skills for a catcher, but this team needs offensive depth more than a savvy backstop.

Left and Center field will be populated by a mix of Ryan Church (best offense), Alex Escobar (best defense), and Nook Logan (fast). As you can see, incompetence is widespread on this team.

The lone bright spot in the lineup, Zimmerman had the best rookie season since someone named Pujols. If he can avoid the sophomore slump he’ll solidify his reputation as a premier third basemen. PECOTA can be somewhat conservative when projecting young players, but in this case it’s predicting he’ll double his VORP to 47.9. That seems optimistic, he’ll be lucky improve marginally on 2006.

A general rule: when a rotation is terrible, the bullpen is unlikely to be any good. Surprise! The Nationals have some decent options after Chad Cordero! 6′11′’ Jon Rauch turned down a spot in the rotation to continue in the pen, and Luis Ayala and Saul Rivera did a great job keeping the ball in the park in significant innings. Sinker-baller Ryan Wagner walked a batter every two innings, which miraculously only resulted in a 4.69 ERA. When pitching to contact walks are far more detrimental, but Wagner must have been adept at squeezing out of jams or benefited from favorable double play timing. The aforementioned Speigner will be the long man, and lefties Michael O’Connor and Brandon Claussen will get their feet wet in the pen after returning from injury.

Keep an eye out for RHP Collin Balester around mid season. He’s barely cracked AA, but they could develop him with the big club if (when) the sh*t hits the fan. His minor league numbers are underwhelming, but he’s been impressive this spring. “I have no fear. I will challenge anybody. I’m not afraid to fail. Failure is not a thing I’m scared of.” Excuse the dangling preposition, he sounds like he means business.

This will be the first of many rebuilding years for this franchise. They’re still playing a football facility, but by 2008 they are scheduled to open a new park. The ship won’t be righted, but by then at least a course will have been set.

By the way, the tagline for Shooter is “Yesterday was about honor. Today is about justice.” For the Nats, yesterday was about honor, but today is about beating my co-ed work softball team.

Prediction: 60-102.

2006: 90-72, 3^rd in AL Central

Projected Lineup:
1. LF Scott Podsednik
2. 3B Joe Crede
3. DH Jim Thome
4. 1B Paul Konerko
5. RF Jermaine Dye
6. C A.J. Pierzynski
7. 2B Tadahito Iguchi
8. CF Darin Erstad
9. SS Juan Uribe/Alex Cintron

Projected Rotation:
Jose Contreras
Jon Garland
Mark Buehrle
Javier Vazquez
John Danks

Projected Closer:
Bobby Jenks

Outlook:

Thank God for Ozzie Guillen. 

Honestly, if it wasn’t for Crazy Ozzie ordering beanings, tossing around insensitive slurs, and pledging allegiance to Hugo Chavez, this version of the Pale Hose would be one of the most boring congregations of professional athletes ever assembled outside of the PGA Tour.  They really need to spice things up a bit.  Maybe Paul Konerko could grow a 6-inch beard like Jeff Bagwell (or Jim “The Anvil” Neidhart, for you fans of the 1980’s squared circle)?  Maybe Jermaine Dye could start breaking bats over his knee when he strikes out?  Maybe Scott Podsednik could start producing runs?  Meh.  At least Juan Uribe is trying to spice things up a by “letting his gat go pop-pop-pop”. 

While I can bemoan their style, I certainly can’t bemoan their results.  After winning their first championship since Shoeless Joe Jackson roamed the outfield, the Sox had a decent season in 2006, winning 90 games (4 more than the real Sox) but finishing behind the surprising Tigers and Twins.  Were it not for the Detroit team shocking the league with their pennant run, the Sox would have likely returned to the playoffs in 2006. 

Their strengths?  The long-ball (1^st in the American League with 236) and some durable starting pitching (their 5 starters averaged 206 innings pitched).  Four of those five pitchers will return, the exception being Freddy Garcia, who was traded away for Gavin Floyd and Gio Gonzalez. 

None of the South Side starters are really going to overwhelm you.  Their best pitcher is probably Old Man Forkball himself, Jose Contreras.  Behind the most well received illegal alien in history are a couple of workhorses who should continue to benefit from solid run support: Mark Buehrle and Jon Garland.  Buehrle’s K rate is declining, but he still has outstanding command and durability, and he still has the most misspelled last name this side of Joel Pineiro.  Javier Vasquez, on the other hand, still possesses the killer stuff, and still frustrates fans and fantasy teams everywhere, by continuing to yield large amounts of extra-base hits to go along with his great peripherals.  He did give up less HRs at Comiskey (that’s right, Comiskey), and could conceivably be the best pitcher in this rotation in 2007.

An interesting wildcard is the new kid in town, John Danks.  Never before having thrown an MLB pitch, Danks has already been anointed a starting pitcher by Guillen, after having a decent (but by no means great) season between AA and AAA last year.  The kid will be put to the test, facing some very tough teams on a regular basis in the AL Central.  He might hold down the fort and pick up some wins behind a steady offense, but if you’re looking for a Rookie of the Year candidate, you might consider looking elsewhere.  The team also has former Phillies prospect Gavin Floyd along with knuckleballer Charlie Haeger waiting in the wings, should a starter go down or should Danks perform terribly.

On to the bullpen, where GM Kenny Williams has added strength by taking part in one of the most-loved activities in baseball: robbing Dayton Moore.  Kenny went in and stole young promising lefty Andy Sisco from Moore, and he isn’t even a lock to make the team.  The Sox have several young hard throwing relievers to handle the late innings.   Closer Bobby Jenks returns to the pivotal role, along with the cannon-armed Mike MacDougal, one of the league’s most feared pitchers.  David Aardsma, the former high-profile draft pick, has come into his own as a solid middle reliever, along with occupying Page 1 of Baseball Encyclopedias everywhere.  Nick Masset is yet another right-hander who can blow hitters away with his high-90’s heat, while 30-year-old lefty Matt Thornton provides effective relief against hitters from both sides of the plate.  The final bullpen spot will likely go to left-hander Boone Logan, leaving the towering Sisco to work on his command in AAA.

As we take a look at the White Sox offense, I’ll start with one of baseball’s more interesting stories: Juan Uribe.  The SS may or may not have shot someone in the Dominican Republic last fall.  The trial has been postponed until July, so the Sox should have his services until at least that time.  Should Uribe need to go to court or the clink, the versatile Alex Cintron should step in to the role.  Cintron might actually be more productive at the position, so perhaps Sox fans should hope for a guilty verdict.  Tadahito Iguchi proved to be one of the most productive offensive second basemen in the league in 2006, and third baseman Joe Crede broke out with a .506 slugging percentage.  At first base, the Sox have the quietest 40 HR guy in baseball history, Paul Konerko.  The Providence native is healthy, only 32 years old, and coming off of his best season.  He has been crushing the ball this spring, and all indications point towards another excellent year.  Newly acquired DH Jim Thome was a monster in his first year in Chicago last season, belting 42 HRs and posting an OPS+ of 156.  He is a remarkably consistent hitter, but has been slowed by the back problems which are obligatory for big guys his age.  Those PA and G totals will continue to dwindle over the coming years, but he is still one of the most feared hitters in the game when he laces them on. 

While Chicago’s infield looks to be at least well above average, their outfield paints a different picture.  We have Jermaine Dye, who was one of the best hitters in baseball in 2006, returning to RF.  The gargantuan slugger is in his contract year, so he will have some tangible motivation for having another healthy, productive season.  However, 2006 was, by far, his best year in the majors, and he is now 33 years old.  Do not bank on a repeat performance near the top of the MVP voting columns, but he can perhaps be counted on for something in the ballpark of .280/.350/.500.  The rest of the outfield is a vast wasteland of offensive impotence.  Darin Erstad will get most of the time in CF.  I won’t spend any time ripping on him (Rob Neyer should take care of that for me), but the most Chicago can hope for is a modest improvement over Brian Anderson’s abortion of a season last year.  Scott Podsednik, out until mid-April, will be spelled by backup Rob Mackowiak until he is ready.  Podsednik will continue to be one of the most unproductive MLB starting outfielders, but he can, of course, steal a base or two.  AJ Pierzynski, 30, returns after a stellar season behind the plate.  The most hated catcher in baseball will have a solid backup in longtime Devil Ray starter Toby Hall.

Chicago is a team which should benefit from a few things: a durable, consistent rotation (a rare thing in today’s game), a lineup dotted with patient boppers, and an electric bullpen.  With the Detroit Tigers looking at a probable decline, Chicago might take advantage and earn a few more wins.  Then again, they still need to deal with Minnesota and Cleveland. 

Prediction: 90-72   

2006: 66-96, Last in NL Central

Projected Lineup
CF Alfonso Soriano (R)
SS Cesar Izturis (S)
1B Derrek Lee (R)
3B Aramis Ramirez (R)
RF Jacque Jones (L)
C Michael Barrett (R)
LF Matt Murton (R)
2B Mark DeRosa (R)

Projected Rotation
RHP Carlos Zambrano
LHP Ted Lilly
RHP Mark Prior
LHP Rich Hill
RHP Jason Marquis

Projected Closer
RHP Ryan Dempster

The Cubs enter the 2007 season with expectations of a championship.  After a dismal 2006 campaign they spent $300 million on free agent acquisitions and, most importantly, will be reunited with a healthy Derrek Lee.  The pressure on this team will be greater than any of their peers; only the Red Sox  approached Cubs’ noise this offseason.  As you know, this isn’t the AL East, the Cubs don’t have the Yankees to blame if they struggle; Lou Pinella won’t be making excuses in an August press conference after being swept by the Brewers.  They have undoubtedly improved, but is it enough to put them over the top?

“Later, Dusty, don’t let the door hit you in the ass on the way out.”  I don’t know how Cubs fans put up with him for as long as they did.  How could they sit back and watch Dusty destroy Mark Prior’s career without calling for his head?  I had a college  roommate that was a casual Cubs fan, whenever I mentioned Dusty he would smile and nod, acknowledging the fact that he was hurting the team, but at the same time he was fine with the fact that they were keeping him around because he was a lovable character.  Well, baseball managers aren’t meant to be lovable.  Joe Torre and Tony “Well, officer I’m just resting my eyes” LaRussa aren’t known for a jolly Santa Claus act, they’re successful because they can balance the attitude of the clubhouse and the wishes of the owners.  I suppose Jim Hendry deserves as much blame as Baker after he let him run wild with Prior in 2003.

If anyone is skeptical of Derrek Lee’s return after missing most of last season with a fractured wrist, he’s 22-43 (.512) with a couple of homers and 6 doubles so far this spring.  Welcome back.  In other news, I’m a founding member of the Alfonso Soriano Sucks Society (ASSS).  We might have gone a click too far, he’s overrated (.325 OBP), but he certainly doesn’t suck; 40/40 is certainly nothing to scoff at.  I found his attempts at the 40th steal hilarious.  He certainly took the “green light” literally, every time he reached first even the hot dog vendors knew he was going on the first pitch.   The offense is improved, but Lee is still the lynch-pin.  Soriano will be out of position twice over, batting leadoff and roaming centerfield.  At the same time, I don’t care if he is below average defensively.  He’ll make the routine plays and hit 35 homers.  Grady Sizemore can’t say that.

So, the best parts of this lineup are superior to the cream of other offenses, but Cesar Izturis (.631 OPS) is batting second?  This is a rare case where the whole is less than the sum of the parts.  Everyone’s right-handed, except Cliff Floyd (injured) and Jacque Jones (career .328 OBP).  Yeah, Aramis Ramirez is a good player and Mark DeRosa had a career year, but from one to nine this lineup looks pretty average.   Why did Matt Murton have to go in the Nomar trade?  I don’t think he’s more than a platoon player at this point, but I never understood why he was included in that deal.  Please explain it to me.  If the Cubs had a legitimate lead off hitter and Soriano was hitting fourth I might be convinced, but this lineup doesn’t scare me.

They didn’t give Big Z his contract, which is probably a smart move.  He reeks of contract year overachiever syndrome, so I’d proceed with caution in the fall.  Don’t get me wrong, he’s been a top 10 starter over the last three years, but his career numbers should determine his next deal.  Backhanded complement summary: he’ll be NASTY in 2007.

After Z the rotation is split between steady vets and high ceiling kids.  Ted Lilly’s three year 4.52 ERA should go down due to weaker opponents in the senior circuit and expectations are marginally above league average performance, no better, no worse.  He and Marquis are depth guys, while Rich Hill and Mark Prior have the talent to dominate.  If the kids get hurt or regress this team isn’t going anywhere.  When an analysis includes “if Mark Prior gets hurt” then maybe its time to scale back expectations a bit, mmmkay?  By June 1 Hill is their number two.  He’s 6′5”, left-handed, and his K rate was over 8 per nine in just under 100 IP last year.

The sooner Ryan Dempster loses the closer’s job, the better.  I (and my fantasy team) can’t wait for Kerry Wood to start unleashing that high heat in the ninth.  Projecting Wood as a reliever is a waste of time, but Dempster has been a ticking time bomb, surrendering 85 walks in 167 innings over the last two years.  Wood may not be ideal for the closer’s role, but he certainly has the stuff.  The rest of the pen is a mirror of the rotation.  Bob Howry struck out 71 in 76 innings while only walking 17, and Will Ohman held lefties to a .158 average.  Neal Cotts fell apart against righties last year, allowing a .579 slugging in 121 at bats versus .209 in 110 at bats in 2005.  Left-hander Scott Eyre had a reverse split, although he wasn’t particularly good against anybody last year.  If Cotts and Eyre return to form, this pen goes from a liability to a strength.

Sweet Lou has his work cut out for him.  A power-laden lineup that won’t get on base matched with a solid but risky rotation and a talented bullpen with ambiguous roles equal a season long headache.   Let me draw it up for you:

[(HOMERS–baserunners)+(Zambrano–Prior in the trainer’s room)]/Ryan Dempster  = ?

On the other hand, if anyone can do it, Lou can.

Projection: 93-69

Notice I didn’t say “Your NEW closer”.

That’s right.  According to a developing report on Boston.com, Jonathan Papelbon will return to the Boston Red Sox closer’s role in 2007.  A formal announcement is expected later today.

My quick, initial opinion on this: I don’t really agree with it. 

My reasoning is rather simple: I prefer A) 175 innings of Papelbon and 80 innings of Julian Tavarez over B) 175 innings of Tavarez/Gabbard/Snyder and 80 innings of Papelbon. 

Unless Jon Lester surprises everyone with an emergence to compliment his miraculous recovery (it’s looking like he is on his way, but not quite there yet), the team could be looking at a bit of a hole in that final starter’s slot.

UPDATE - 10:00 PM:
From the new Gordon Edes report (linked above), it appears that the decision was made by Papelbon himself.  It seems he feels most comfortable in the closer’s role.  If this is the case, I can’t really blame Francona for acquiescing.  Looking at some of his quotes, he seems rather adamant about his choice.

Generally, in baseball, switching positions is like trying out new scuba gear: if you don’t feel comfortable, you don’t jump in.  Although I’m disappointed to be deprived of 200 Papelbonian innings, I do feel some security knowing the 9th inning is no longer a question mark.

I was lucky enough to catch Matsuzaka’s start on ESPN today. Unfortunately Dan Shulman and I were subject to Steve Philips and Orel Hershiser as the color guys. When Dickie V visited the booth Dan and I both looked at him some serious puppy dog eyes, if my choices are Philips and Orel I’m firmly pro-Vitale.

First Inning:

He started Chris Duffy out with a fastball at 91 spotted well on the outside corner, then promptly hit him with a slider on the thigh. Remember to breathe Zach, its only a spring training start. Wouldn’t you feel silly if you had an aneurysm during a meaningless game? After hanging a few to shortstop Don Kelly he looked great on a 2-0 curve for a strike. Very nice pitch. I like that he stuck with a pitch that wasn’t working and got it figured out quickly instead of scrapping it for the inning. Adam LaRoche drove Duffy in on a line drive to right that J.D. trapped rather awkwardly. Off the bat I didn’t think he’d have a chance at catching it, nice jump. I’ve moved Jason Bay down a few spots on my fantasy draft board after his performance today. Ball, called fastball strike, middle-in fastball fouled back, big whiff on a 83 MPH breaking ball. Daisuke isn’t firing on all cylinders, but he got outs.

Watch for the MLB 07: The Show video game commercial with the fish tossing. Instant classic.

Second: A few nasty sliders to Jose Batista mixed in with some more hanging breaking balls. I have a lot of trouble discerning pitch type because his velocity and movement varies so much. Hershisher makes a comment about Diasuke being unimpressive so far. At this point I agree, he got three outs, but everything was hit hard. He wasn’t spotting his fastball, but a few curves fell off the table.

Farrell Interview in top of the third:
-Diasuke likes to establish all his pitches in the first inning, not work in patterns.
-His heavy workload and marathon bullpen sessions are a product of the 6 man rotation. He’s used to it so he’ll stick with it for now.
-Occasionally he’ll work up in the zone with his fastball but everything will be down normally.
-He has 2-3 above average pitches. One variation of his changeup might be the gyroball everyone’s been talking about.
-He’s right where he needs to be at this point and doing very well speaking English.

I was very impressed with how articulate and graceful Farrell spoke. He can hold a room.

Third: GYROBALL ALERT! GYROBALL ALERT! After embarrassing Gorzellany at the plate Duffy’s second at bat was a battle. The eighth and ninth pitches were odd 88 MPH splitter/screwball things that Philips and Hershiser agreed were changeups that broke like a screwball. Anyway, it was nasty. Also an environmentalist, Diasuke picked up some trash that was blowing around the mound. FYI: I wouldn’t touch the trash blowing around in the Bronx. He’s retired seven in a row to this point. 39 pitches, 28 strikes.

Fourth: He was the best I’ve seen him in the fourth. He hit 96 (!) on the ESPN gun after getting pissed off about a call not going his way. Chill out kid, its still March. He struck out LaRoche after falling behind and battling back with a mix of pitches. Bay looked overmatched and was shown a seat in the dugout after three pitches: 77, 88, and 93 MPH. 10 in a row.

Fifth: During a dugout interview, LaRoche says Matsuzaka’s changeup is “phenomenal.” He’s operated a little lower in his velocity range in this inning, dipping down into the mid-70s with more frequency but playing it off the 93 MPH fastball that has suddenly found the corners. A nice 79 MPH knee buckler to Jose Batista elicited some laughter. I must proceed with caution in this area, but during 99 and 2000 it was more fun to watch the team in the field than at the plate during Pedro’s starts. Just sayin’. Hinske flashed the leather on a screamer up the first bast line then smacked the bag from his stomach with emphasis.

Sixth: Paraphrased dugout interview with Lowell: it wasn’t his best stuff, but he got it done. When do we get to see the good stuff? I’m salivating. Tito pulled him after his seventh strikeout in a long at bat for Kelly. That conference on the mound was high comedy. Smiles all around, awkward bowing and pats on the butt.

By the way, Orel is convinced. Get ready, Red Sox Nation.

5.2 IP, 1 H, 1 R, 7 Ks

Edit: thanks Mouse. How’d my editor miss that one? Oh right, cause I’m my editor.

2006: 78-84, 4th in AL West

Jimmy, where do you get those fancy pictures?

Projected Lineup
CF Ichiro (L)
3B Adrian Beltre (R)
DH Jose Vidro (S)
LF Raul Ibanez (L)
1B Richie Sexson (R)
RF Jose Guillen (R)
C Kenji Johjima (R)
2B Jose Lopez (R)
SS Yuniesky Betancourt (R)

Projected Rotation
RHP Felix Hernandez
LHP Jarrod Washburn
RHP Miguel Batista
RHP Jeff Weaver
LHP Horacio Ramirez

Closer
RHP J.J. Putz

It’s midnight in a Philadelphia hotel, and the only thing I want to happen in the next five minutes is the dude in the next room to realize the porn preview is A) on repeat or B) extremely loud. If he’s dead am I a witness? Gross.

It’s teams like the 2007 Mariners that give me hope. They give me hope that I’m not just some shmuck waxing and waning on the internet with words that no one particularly wants to read. They give me hope that this magical game isn’t run by a group of super-powered geniuses turned CEOs. They give me hope that someday I’ll have my happiness in the palm of my hand instead of trusting it to strangers. Why? Because I know I could run a better baseball team.

Career OBP: .328
2004 OBP: .388

Career SLG: .457
2004 SLG: .629

Career High HR (other than 04): 25
2004 HR: 48

2007 Salary: $11.5 million

Pencils down. If I have to tell you whose numbers these are, you’re coming to the wrong site. Of course, he’s only one in a long line of those who have made Bill Bavasi look like a fool. Do you think the baseball ops interns ever have to leave a conference call during fit of the giggles because Bavasi started comparing pitchers based on wins or third basemen on batting average? He’s clearly not mentally sound, someone please call a doctor.

Then there was the Rafael Soriano deal. And the Jose Vidro signing. And the Miguel Batista contract. Every general manager makes mistakes, perfection is impossible in a business based on guessing opinions, but to fail at such a consistent and obvious level is unprecedented. Even keeping Mike Hargrove manning the wheel, a guy that hasn’t had a winning season since 1999, is cause for concern. Put down that coffee, Seattle, and have an old fashioned witch hunt with Bill Bavasi the target.

He must see something I don’t in Horacio Ramirez. He’s left-handed, but his upside is around league average and he has regressed the last two seasons. Money was thrown at Jarrod Washburn and Batista like they were the last pitchers available, while both have shown flashes of brilliance they are far from sure things. Jeff Weaver is back in the AL, and probably has the most raw talent out of any of these guys. I expect Safeco to be on his side more than most and emerge as the most reliable starter in this group. Wow, I never thought I’d be endorsing Jeff Weaver.

Like a middle school crush, PECOTA is enamored with Felix Hernandez, projecting a 3.75 ERA and 8 K/9. Its certainly not an unreasonable expectation but the kid is still learning how to pitch and I can’t imagine the tone of a Johjima-Felix mound conversation. I tend to agree with Keith Woolner’s research on the lack of impact a catcher has on his pitchers’ performance, except in extreme situations. I’m about to go off on a tangent here, but after watching Varitek for the last 10 years (holy shit it’s been that long?) I think an excellent game calling catcher provides more than simply pitch selection, but a mental edge based on trust. A pitcher is always told to “trust his stuff” but how is that possible he perceives the guy the behind the plate as incompetent? I’m not saying Johjima can’t call a game, but everything I’ve heard suggests he doesn’t attempt to develop a relationship with his pitchers. A catcher that’s one step ahead of batters will be a calming influence on any hurler. Give Felix a few weeks with a guy like ‘Tek and his performance improves, guaranteed.

You can count me out of the J.J. Putz fan club. Did you suddenly realize that it was easier to get outs when the guys didn’t hit the ball? Why did your strike out numbers double last year while your innings increased marginally? Did someone just now explain that three strikes is the same as a groundout? I’m just not making the connection here. Thirty year old pitchers don’t have the drastic about-face like that you experienced in 2006. If I’m your GM, I wait at least a half a season before I trade your best set-up man and injury insurance for half his value. Oh wait, that already happened. What could Rafael Soriano have netted the M’s in June? Well, if the Red Sox closer situation shakes out like our worst fears, Craig Hansen and David Murphy could have been in teal before the summer sun is at its peak. Good thing we don’t have to worry about that.

For the record, I’m not panicking about the Sox closer sitch. I think the need will be addressed as soon as its clear that it is a need. Cool as a cucumber. That’s my story and I’m stickin’ to it.

After Putz (and maybe even including him) the pen is pretty average. Chris Reitsma is looking to bounce back but his previous best was underwhelming. Julio Mateo had the makings of a decent season before he dropped a stack of weights on his non-throwing hand, he should be full strength. Jon Huber had a very nice debut in the bigs last year, after his transition to the bullpen in the minors in 2004 he has adjusted well and achieved some demonstrable success. Arthur Rhodes and George Sherril are the lefties, and Cha Seung Baek will be the long man and first to step into the rotation. Baek wasn’t as good as his 3.67 ERA suggests after his call up from Tacoma last fall, Tristan Cockcroft should maybe look at his home run and strikeout numbers before declaring him a suitable replacement for Jeff Weaver.

From the Commissioner’s office: I’ve been asked by King Selig to take it easy on ole Bavasi for the next few paragraphs. Don’t worry, I’m not selling out.

I like the Mariners’ outfield. Raul Ibanez was very good again last season, if not providing good defense he complemented the other hitters in the lineup to the tune of 123 RBI. He loves hitting at lefty-friendly Safeco, his OPS is 120 points higher, but still can’t figure out LHP. It would make a lot of sense to have a capable right handed hitting fourth outfielder to spell Raul against LHP, unfortunately none of those words describe Jeremy Reed. Some of the best moves are the ones you never make, eh Theo? RHH Adam Jones might be up by midseason if Reed tanks again.

The addition of Jose Guillen moves Ichiro to center. Look for a number of frozen ropes from the gap in right to third base with these two guys fighting over doubles. Nobody has tremendous range, so balls will get down, but they’ll make up for it with obscene assist numbers. Guillen will provide nice value, I don’t care if he’s a bad clubhouse guy and has played on 7 teams since 2001. There’s no way he repeats his legendary 23 bombs/21 doubles in 315 at-bats, but a one-year $5.5m deal isn’t terrible. Ichiro is in his walk year, but an improvement is unlikely just because he’s set the bar so high. His 2004 is one of the greatest seasons of this decade, so I’d expect somewhere between last year’s .370/.416 and that .414/.455. He’s never hit for power in the states like he did in Japan, maybe his looming free agency will inspire him to hit the weights. Truly a one of a kind player, no one else gets on base with such frequency without displaying much patience at the plate.

Poor fielding second basemen suddenly deserve jobs as designated hitters? Jose Vidro has hit a total of 14 home runs over the last 2 seasons so he’s not exactly suited for cleanup, but that’s where he’s penciled in as of today. His value is probably halved or worse when he’s moved out of position. I find it very hard to believe that an offensive output comparable to Vidro’s couldn’t be found in the scrap heap of some roster if position isn’t a factor. Jose Lopez is no wizard out there either, PECOTA says he cost the team 18(!) runs last year on defense, so this roster is handcuffed by two poor fielding second basemen, both of whom are middle of the pack offensively. Give this GM a raise.

That deep left field gap in Safeco is a graveyard for Richie Sexson homers. He hits to all fields, but loves to unleash his long, slow swing and pull the ball into the gap in left. He’s just 32 and will produce up to his career averages, but don’t expect any more 45 homer campaigns when he plays 82 in Safeco.

The M’s are going to pay quite a bit for each win in 2007; there are a lot of overpaid bums enjoying the laid back lifestyle in the Pacific northwest. Ichiro’s pending contract negotiations will be a season long distraction as this team determines its direction and I’m very interested in how these talks play out. They have clearly built a fan base around him and their owner is Japanese so they have a vested interest in him, but the way money has been thrown around the last two offseasons might make them pause before a nine-figure deal. As much as I’d like to watch him in Boston, I can’t see him anywhere but in a Mariner’s uni. They’ll get it done.

EDIT: I just realized I forgot to include my record prediction.

Projected finish: 75-87

Boston Herald writer Karen Guregian thinks that the Sox problems would be resolved if they just had a big, heaping bowl of Kevin Millar to snack on.

There is no secret what Millar brings to the clubhouse. His wackiness and keep-it-loose-at-all-costs attitude gets a good amount of credit for the Red Sox coming back against the Yankees in 2004. I can’t speak to the truthiness of that…I wasn’t in the clubhouse, I am not a Major League baseball player, and I have a want to deal in the more tangible aspects of baseball. But right or wrong, Millar gets a bunch of credit for helping create that culture.

Often times though, I am annoyed by the spectre that follows him around. I always saw the idea of Millar being some sort of beneviolent svengali of clubhouses, bending the will of unlike teammates to work toward a common goal of winning baseball games and partyin’ on dude (!) as being more in the mind of the people around the team…with Millar himself being the chief snake oil salesman.

During his time here, the perception of Kevin Millar was that he was a happy clown. I mean, the Born in the USA lip synch from his younger days was worth it’s weight in laughter. But when you look deeper, so saw things like quotes from Terry Francona, saying that “One Millar is fine, but you couldn’t have a team of them”. You saw his skills diminishing, and then bitching about the possibility of him sitting more for other players (”El bencho”).

The worst thing about the Millar experience was that I never got the feeling he really knew his place in the cosmic order of the Red Sox. During 2005, he frequently talked up what he does for the ball club, mentioning his own intangibles, which is kind of like a college student reminding his parents about his 1280 SAT’s when his first report card has a 1.8 on it. He openly campaigned for his spot in the lineup, saying how it was good for the team to have him around. The question that should have been begged, but wasn’t was that if Millar was such a good teammate, why did he put himself before John Olerud, Roberto Petagine and Kevin Youkilis? If he was a positive influence on the clubhouse, if he didn’t keep his spot, why would he pout and poison any chemistry that he might otherwise positively effect?

The other prong in the fraud of Millar was his perceived influence on Manny Ramirez. When the end was neigh, Millar reminded people in a not-so-subtle way that he helped keep Manny in check. Without him…I mean, just imagine the distraction that Manny Ramirez would be! Of course, we don’t have to imagine. Despite being a hitter of prolific nature, Manny is good for one team-wide distraction a season. He was in 2003, and 2004. Also in 2005, and 2006. If Millar had that much of an effect on Manny, why was he such a distraction in the Millar era (03-05) and then again post-Millar? Where, exactly, was Kevin Millar’s influence on the will of Manny Ramirez?

The rest of the article talks about things like how there are no more Idiots, and how Millar thinks the 2004 crew should have been brought back for 2005 (even though the only significant changes to the roster were Cabrera and Pedro)…all the sorts of canned nonsense that people like Bill Simmons eats up. Millar himself will always be a polarizing figure in Red Sox history, at least until the memories of him doing Born in the USA wane. The ironic thing is that his actual contributions to the team (including drawing the walk that lead to the Steal) will probably always be underrated in the shadow of his own intangibled propaganda.

A sign that you are getting old: it’s 9 PM, it’s Saturday night, it’s St. Patrick’s Day, and you are sitting in bed with a laptop, sober, watching kids between 6 and 10 years younger than you play basketball on TV.  Sigh…

The Arizona Diamondbacks

2006 record: 76-86, 4^th place NL West

Projected Lineup:
CF Chris Young
2B Orlando Hudson
3B Chad Tracy
LF Eric Byrnes
1B Conor Jackson
RF Carlos Quentin
SS Stephen Drew
C Chris Snyder

Projected Rotation:
Brandon Webb
Randy Johnson
Livan Hernandez
Doug Davis
Micah Owings

Projected Closer:
Jose Valverde

Outlook:

”Sometimes, I think it’s a sin, when I feel like I’m winning when I’m losing again”  -Gordon Lightfoot

Last week we discussed the Florida Marlins, a young franchise in a rebuilding process after dismantling a championship team.  The D-Backs are going through a similar situation, except they are not really having as much success as their gilled cousins from Miami.  Arizona certainly has the young talent on the rise, but they don’t really have any veteran bats to help guide the process.  They lost the hero of the 2001 World Series, Luis Gonzalez, to free agency.  They traded away solid-hitting catcher Johnny Estrada to Milwaukee.  The holes will be filled with some very promising (yet green) young players. 

The Diamondbacks have flaunted one of baseball’s best minor-league prospect lists for the last two years, and we are now seeing some of the crops bear fruit.  Arizona will hope that the fruit will be ripe enough to carry their offense in 2007. 

At the front of the rotation, Arizona boasts one of the best pitchers in the National League, 2006 Cy Young Award winner Brandon Webb.  Webb has been consistently excellent since entering the league in 2003, with a career ERA+ of 139.  The right-hander will be 28 in May, and should continue to provide 200+ high-quality innings.  Factor in the improved infield and outfield defense, and Webb is a decent bet to repeat as an All-Star starter. 

One of the larger news items in the hot stove season was the trade of future Hall of Famer and world-renowned surly bastard Randy Johnson.  Johnson asked out of New York, and the Yankees were more than eager to acquiesce, after the gangly lefty stunk worse than the Hudson River in July.  Some assume that Randy will bounce back, because Randy is just one of those guys who “can’t play in New York”.  Others (I would probably fit into this camp) believe that he would be terrible in any venue, whether it’s New York, Phoenix, Seattle, Iowa City, or Planet Eris.  He’ll be 44 in September, and his K ratios, Randy’s bread and butter, have been decreasing steadily.  He might have a bit more success than he had in 2006, simply because the competition level in the AL East is higher than in the NL West, but it would be foolhardy to expect him to return to his 300 K days. 

Behind RJ is perhaps the most infamous innings-eater in the major leagues, the man with the rubber arm: Livan Hernandez.  Amazingly, in each of his 9 full seasons, Livan has pitched 200 or more innings.  He has made at least 33 starts in 7 straight seasons.  While he can be counted on to show up and pitch, the Diamondbacks are hoping they get above-average innings from the sometimes inconsistent right-hander.  Livan’s career ERA+ is 101, which means his performance has been just about average (regardless of durability). 

Doug Davis is a new acquisition from Milwaukee, and like Livan, he can be counted on for numerous quality innings, and has a solid track record (career ERA+ of 102).  Unlike Livan, Doug Davis is a bit of a stringbean (6’4”, 190 lbs), and he is a lefty.  Aside from those minor details, they are similar performers.  The final rotation spot is still up for grabs, but rookie Micah Owings has been impressing management, and is probably the front-runner as of this writing. Other candidates include Enrique Gonzalez, Edgar Gonzalez, the chronically disappointing Juan Cruz, and rookie prospect Dustin Nippert.

Now, while the rotation looks decent enough, especially if the Big Unit is on his game,  the bullpen situation is looking a bit dicey.  Manager Bob Melvin has already anointed fireballing Jose Valverde closer.  Jose did strike out 12.6 guys per 9 innings last seasons, but was eminently hittable, with a WHIP of 1.46.  If he can maintain his high-velocity stuff, Valverde should improve upon those numbers in 2006, perhaps establishing himself as a lights-out closer in the National League.  Behind Valverde is Jorge Julio, also a guy who can be counted on for a K in a pinch (12 K per 9 IP in 2006), but does have control issues and gives up plenty of HRs. 

Behind the two fireballers, the Arizona bullpen is shallower than a sorority girl.  Old friend Brandon Lyon is there, as well as Tony Pena (no relation to the former catcher), but neither right-hander can be counted on for more than league-average innings at best.  27-year-old Brandon Medders is an interesting bullpen arm, and has had success in his brief time at the major league level.  However, he doesn’t miss very many bats, and must rely on pinpoint control to be effective.  The final spots in the bullpen will likely go to a lefty, and the frontrunners for the job are prospect Dana Eveland (who is also a longshot for the 5^th starter job), and rookie Doug Slaten.

The Arizona lineup has a few extremely promising parts, including a solid bet for 2007 NL Rookie of the Year: 5-tool centerfielder Chris Young.  Young is an offensive and defensive wunderkind, an absolute vacuum cleaner in CF, and a guy who can provide pop, patience, and speed on offense.  The one knock against the rookie: he sometimes has trouble making contact.  As long as he can keep the Ks to a reasonable rate, Young should become one of the most productive players in this lineup.  While it is speculated that Arizon is actively looking for a leadoff hitter before the season begins, Young is the guy expected to bat first, if the roster remains unchanged.  Carlos Quentin is another up-and-coming outfielder in this talent-rich organization, and the 24-year-old will get the starting RF job out of the gate.  Quentin does not have the speed of Young, but he is a nice offensive player who will produce from the right side of the plate. 

In left field will be one of my personal least favorite players:  Eric Byrnes.  He of the golden locks had a decent 2006, belting a career-high 26 HRs and swiping 25 bases in 28 opportunities.  While Byrnes may be a decent role player, he shouldn’t be counted on as an offensive lynchpin.  Unfortunately for Arizona, Byrnes is slated to bat cleanup in 2007.  Switch-hitting Jeff DaVanon is an excellent 4^th OF option, and could fill in adequately if any of the starters get hurt (or decide to suck). 

Headlining the infield is Stephen Drew, who was terrific in his half-season debut in 2006.  His slugging percentage of .517 might be difficult to maintain, as his extra base hits included a whopping 7 triples in 223 plate appearances.  Still, the young shortstop will be one of the better hitters at his position, and he should be about average defensively.  He could eventually replace his double-play mate, Orlando Hudson, at the 2-hole in the batting order.  Hudson did have a career year in 2006, and his offensive production has been steadily improving each year.  He’s only 29, still capable of breaking out with the .300/.375/.475 type of season Blue Jays fans were hoping to see from the switch-hitter throughout the first half of his career.  If it’s going to happen, it will likely happen this season. 

The corner infield, like the middle, is also stocked with promising young talent.  Conor Jackson, the 25-year-old right-handed hitting first baseman, will not be slugging with the likes of his counterparts in Philly and St. Louis, but he does have impressive contact and walk rates.  However, if you ever hear anyone comparing him to John Olerud, please slap them, for me.  There are several reasons why the comparison is awful (defense and handedness being the two obvious reasons).  It’s of those little baseball discussion traps: whenever you have a first baseman who hits, but not for power, he’ll be compared to John Olerud. 95% of the time, the comparison makes no sense. There really was only one of Olerud (who is arguably qualified for Cooperstown, when you look closely at his body of work).  Anyway, I digress. 

Third baseman Chad Tracy did not match his outstanding career year of 2005, but is 27 years old, and PECOTA is expecting an improvement over his pedestrian 2006.  He’s a butcher in the field, but the team desperately needs his bat in the lineup.  Backing up 3B, SS, and 2B will be rookie Alberto Callaspo, who should be one of the toughest men in baseball to strike out.  The switch-hitter fanned only 27 times in 554 plate appearances in the Pacific Coast League last season.  Backing up first-base is Tony Clark (yup, still around), looking to squeeze out a few more days in the sun.  Despite his horrid Red Sox stint, I’m rooting for him.  He does hit from both sides of the plate, and Arizona will take whatever offense they can get.  Fighting for a roster spot is the oft-injured Robby Hammock, who does have versatility on his side: aside from playing some corner infield, the 29-year-old can also serve as a third catcher. 

The catching situation in Arizona is an interesting one.  We have Chris Snyder (a righty), who was very impressive as a backup in 2006, and we have Miguel Montero (a lefty), an up-and-coming catcher who has bashed his was through the minor leagues.  Snyder is the better fielder, while Montero would probably out-hit him. Expect Snyder to get most of the time out of the gate, which could change quickly if Montero forces Melvin’s hand. As I’ve been saying, this team will need to squeeze runs out of every position, however they can.

Overall, this team is a rather tough one of evaluate, as there are quite a few young wildcards in the lineup, and one 44-year-old wildcard in the rotation.  The pitching staff looks decent enough.  Webb is one of baseball’s best, and Randy Johnson could prove me wrong by adding another All-Star season to his outlandish Hall of Fame resume. 

However, when all is said and done, we’re looking at a team that will be expecting a whole lot of some young guys who have yet to see a full MLB season.  Most of the other  teams in their division are improved.  The sun gets very hot in Phoenix, and the MLB season is long and grueling.  Even with all this young talent, their cleanup hitter is still Eric Byrnes. 

Expect rough waters for the Snakes in 2007. 

Prediction:  78 – 84

Top 10 Prospects:
Chris Young, CF
Carlos Gonzales, OF
Justin Upton, OF (Yes, third.  Let his bat do the talking.)
Micah Owings, RHP
Miguel Montero, C
Dana Eveland, LHP
Alberto Callaspo, 2B/SS
Dustin Nippert, RHP
Gerardo Parra, OF
Matt Torra, RHP

2006: 96-66, 1st in AL Central, swept by Oakland Athletics in LDS

Projected Lineup
2B Luis Castillo (B)
3B Nick Punto (B)
C Joe Mauer (L)
RF Michael Cuddyer (R)
1B Justin Morneau (L)
CF Torii Hunter (L)
LF Rondell White (R)
DH Jason Kubel (L)
SS Jason Bartlett (R)

Projected Rotation
LHP Johan Santana
RHP Boof Bonser
RHP Carlos Silva
RHP Ramon Ortiz
RHP Matt Garza

Closer
RHP Joe Nathan

“Contraction is coming. There will be at least two fewer teams in the major leagues next year. Is it the answer to all the ails baseball? Absolutely not. Is it a proper step in attempting to restructure the economic foundation of the greatest game in the world? Absolutely.”
- Karl Ravech, February 8, 2002

If Bud got his wish back in 2001, maybe Justin Morneau would be be wearing a B on his cap instead of the interlocking TC.  Then again, maybe Joe Mauer would work in the Bronx.  The lowly Twins of eight straight sub-.500 finishes were being circled by the vultures known as the Major League Baseball attorneys, destined for the guillotine, or so King Selig would like us (and the Players’ Association) to believe.  Well Bud, your “competitive imbalance” and “economic crisis” have changed quite a bit since then.  Les Expos Neauvoux are now drawing on the wealth of Washington and the Twins stadium deal will go through, eventually.  Owner Carl Pohlad has expressed a commitment to the Twin Cities, reaching deeper into his pockets to make the stadium deal work than he’s put into the payroll in years.  Across the board, owners are making record profits and salaries have skyrocketed.

Every team has a flaw.  In Minnesota, it’s a thin rotation in which two young pitchers are expected to improve.  While the lineup will come close to their 801 runs scored last year, the pitching staff will undoubtedly surrender more than 683.  The loss of wunderkid Fransisco Liriano will be felt to the core.  Carlos Silva must return to his 71/9 K/BB form of 2005 for the Twinkies to contend in 2007.

I still chuckle every time I hear “Boof Bonser.“  In my mind he’s some twisted Biff Tannen/Cliff Claven doppleganger.  I hope you realize there is no greater praise than being compared to those two American heroes; by the way, John Ratzenberger is on the new season of “Dancing with the Stars.”  I think I’ll go tango with my mailman to show my support.  The Pohlad grandkids are rooting for Boof to catch Marty McFly this time around, hoverboard and all.  Two-plus years in AAA?  An 18 start tryout on a team that didn’t care if you failed?  It’s put-up or shut-up time Biff, I mean…Boof.  Really though, he was pretty damn good last year, a 4.22 ERA and 1.28 WHIP are worth a “Good job, Rook, now carry my luggage and put on that tutu.”  If not a “thank you” or “nice legs” afterwards.

What happened to you, L’il Pedro?  You used to scare my socks off when I saw you in the Pitching Probables against Frank Castillo.  It certainly didn’t look like you were juicin’, you couldn’t have been more than 165 back in 2002.  You’ve bounced from Cincinatti to Les Expos Neauvoux and now you’ve landed in the Hefty ™ bag.  An ERA around 5.00 is approximately the upper boundary on success from Rrrrrramon Ortiz.  P.S. I keep rolling my rrrr’s like a latino porn star and inadvertently gleeking all over my keyboard. Try it, I’m sure the intern in the cube next to you will think its totally sexy.

It turns out that parts of California are NOT on the beach.  I know, I was floored as well.  I was ready to launch into a tirade about how lucky Matt Garza was for sailing through a few years at Fresno State, striking out over-matched opponents and hangin’ out on the beach with a bevy of buxom beauties, but there are no beaches in Fresno according to Google Maps.  Well, at least he’s got all that talent to fall back on.  The 2005 top draft pick has been nothing but successful since joining the professional ranks, I only question his ability to increase his innings over a long schedule.  Thankfully, the Twins organization has been historically adept at keeping young starters healthy (save Liriano).  If he continues on the same trend he’ll be no worse than the third best pitcher on this team.

Everyone’s favorite rowdy Aruban, Sidney Ponson, will be there to eat some innings in the event of injury.  Scott Baker also provides some depth, and wasn’t as bad as his 6.37 ERA suggests.  His April 14th start against the Yankees is evidence enough of his ability.  Another hot prospect, Glen Perkins, is waiting in the wings.

So, the Radke era is over.  (Tear.)  He was a bastion of consistency, unfortunately he wasn’t consistently excellent.  The Twins have successfully reloaded with young starters, but there won’t be time for development in a strong and balanced division.  Last year the offense underwent a similar transition.  No longer is Torii Hunter the centerpiece of the lineup, my MVP, Joe Mauer, and his sidekick Justin Morneau emerged to no one’s surprise as elite hitters.  I’m confident that Mauer will be similarly good, if not win another batting title, but I have my doubts about More-No.  For all the praise heaped on young Joe, little is uttered about Justin.  My hesitance to proclaim him the next Todd Helton is based on instinct more than reason, everything about his numbers suggests continued success.

From the “holy shit, I didn’t see that coming” department we’re joined by Michael Cuddyer.  He doubled his previous best home run and RBI totals, which is no doubt remarkable, but his 130 Ks don’t bode well.  He walked a fair amount (62), but I hate swings and misses nearly as much as I hate the NCAA selection committee right now.  This team is very left-handed, they need a guy like Cuddyer to produce for everything to jive.  No pressure, kid.  Cut down those Ks and we’ll talk.

The top of the lineup did its job reasonably well last year, but regression should be expected.  Luis Castillo is no spring chicken, he’ll be 32 by the end of the season, and his talent for getting from point A to point B faster than the average player will wane with every step.  He’s never been a five tool guy, but he’s a patient hitter (3.98 P/PA) and usually provides solid defense.  Nick Punto is a Gardenhire favorite, but also lacks any semblance of power.  He’s slotted for the two hole, but he’s a bottom of the barrel corner infielder.  His range is adequate for second base and he has experience there, so look for him to take over for Castillo in 2008.  I can definitely see Mike Lowell in a Twins uni next year.

Outfield defensive skill is very difficult to measure, and perception (usually of centerfielders) is often skewed by what I like to call The Griffey Effect.  I know you remember when Ken Griffey Jr. was basically the co-host of Sportscenter, making catches over the Kingdome wall nightly like it was old hat.  People like myself saw this and drew the conclusion that he was a fantastic defensive CF.  Well, obviously a player that has a wall just high enough to jump over in his home stadium will be better at making those catches, have more chances to do it, and therefore save a few more home runs.  I’m not saying Griffey is a poor centerfielder, but fans and experts alike jumped to the conclusion that he was the best based on a bad sample.  Torii Hunter is another beneficiary of the Griffey Effect.  It’s his walk year, so he should be in money-making shape.

The left field situation is shaping up to be a battle.  Incumbent Rondell White is still making a go of it, but he’s got  old friend Lew Ford, Jason Tyner, and another Gardenhire favorite in Josh “Broccoli” Rabe contending for the job.  DH Jason Kubel might get some time there as well.  Matthew LeCroy is back in Minny after a quick jaunt to our nation’s capitol, look for him spelling Kubel at DH against tough lefties.  Let’s hope, for everyone’s sake, he doesn’t get any time behind the plate.  If you’ve forgotten there was an ugly incident that involved a few dozen passed balls one fateful afternoon last summer.

Jason Bartlett is the shortstop by default, but Red Sox Rule 5 pick Alejandro Machado might see some time.  Gardenhire has said the Punto won’t be used at short, but I don’t exactly understand why.  Veteran Jeff Cirillo will be a pinch hitter and utility infielder.

The Twins had the best bullpen in baseball last year.  After Joe Nathan they were Jesse Crain (3.52 ERA), Dennys Reyes (0.89!), Matt Guerrier (3.36), and Juan Rincon (2.91).  I know ERA is a poor judge of a reliever’s ability, but when a bullpen has five guys under 3.52 something is working.

Brian Sabean and his masterful acquisition of A.J. Pierzynski has laid the groundwork for a bright future in Minnesota.  This season will be moderately frustrating, but after some of the fat is trimmed next offseason, Liriano comes back strong, and the kids get another year of seasoning the Twins are poised to contend for years to come.  There’s also some dude named Johan Santana.

Prediction: 85-77

2006: 62-100, 5th in AL Central

Lineup
CF David DeJesus (L)
2B Mark Grudzielanek (R)
RF Mark Teahen (L)
DH Mike Sweeney (R)
1B Ryan Shealy (R)
3B Alex Gordon (L)
LF Emil Brown (R)
C Jason LaRue (R)
SS Angel Berroa (R)

Rotation
RHP Gil Meche
LHP Odalis Perez
RHP Luke Hudson
LHP Jorge de la Rosa
RHP Zack Greinke
Closer
Octavio Dotel

In continuation of the “soft stuff in the middle” phase of the Dewey’s House previews, I present your 2007 Kansas City Royals!

Over the last three seasons the Royals have allowed more than 905 runs and scored less than 757, which has translated to a pitiful best of 100 losses. Since winning 83 in 2003 there has been little joy on the banks of the Missouri River, with Mike Sweeney the biggest loser in this disaster. After making it clear during 2003 contract negotiations that he would remain loyal as long as the Royals were committed to winning, his stipulation of a .500 finish in 2003 locked him into the final three years of the deal. He should have been more aggressive in his winning demands, since then he has languished on a miserable team, watching his prime years slip away due to injury.

In five of the six major team pitching categories, the Royals were dead last in the league in 2006. If you’re curious, they managed 12th place in saves. It would be too easy to recap the things that went wrong in 2006, and after all, this is a preview not a review. In the great words of the Bart and Lisa’s overlord Kang “We must move forward… not backwards, not to the side, not forwards, but always whirling, whirling, whirling towards freedom” (Treehouse of Horror VII). I’ll do us all a favor and move on.

Hope rests in the talent of third basemen Alex Gordon. The second overall pick in the 2005 draft tore through the system like his pants were on fire, tossing up a AA 1.015 OPS and stealing 22 of 25 bases in 2006. He’s had a bit of a sore shoulder this spring after diving for a ball, but should be out no more than a week. Rarely does a young player move a team’s best hitter out of position, but Buddy Bell has said that Gordon will push Mark Teahen to the outfield. Teahen made a vast improvement over his poor effort in 2005, but I’d say he played to the height of his ability last year. That’s not to say he’ll be a liability either in the field or at the plate, everyone should be happy with a WARP around 5.5. He’s athletic and has the arm for right field; his transition should be a smooth one.

David DeJesus and Ryan Shealy round out possibly the AL’s most talented group of young players that will be opening day starters. If not a perfect lead off hitter, DeJesus gets on base at a good clip (.364) and runs well. He’s not a stolen base threat, with a career high of eight (with 11 caught stealing). I’ve always enjoyed watching DeJesus play, and it’s not because of his movie-star good looks. Shealy looks and swings a little like Travis Hafner and is destined to end up a designated hitter once Mike Sweeney bolts town after this season, opening up 1B for prospect Justin Huber. The oft-injured Sweeney has missed at least 40 games over the last 4 seasons so he’ll need to remain healthy this year if he hopes to get a multi-year deal after 2007. He’s a young 33 so breaking the 30 home run barrier for the first time in his career isn’t out of the question. I wouldn’t expect anything approaching his 2000 total of 144 RBIs, but he’ll once again be the centerpiece of the KC lineup.

I don’t know much about Esteban German’s defense at 2B, but it must be pretty awful if they chose to resign aging Mark Grudzielanek instead of giving German and his .422 OBP the job. Third base is crowded and Reggie Sanders has the fourth OF spot, so German will be the first guy off the bench in the infield. I put Emil Brown slightly ahead of Sanders for the starting job in left based mostly on youth over age, but it could easily be the opposite.

The recipient of the inaugural Dewey’s House Worst Regular of the Year award is Angel Berroa. He managed to finish last in the league in both OBP and SLG, which miraculously translates to a last place finish in OPS as well. Somehow his OPS+ is still 48; that’s gotta be a bug in the formula. I think we should rename the DHWROY simply, the Berroa, but I can’t start making decrees just yet. His defense was bad, and his offense could be replaced by anyone not named Tony Womack. The situation at short has moved from an Orange Alert to firmly Red, and it doesn’t get much better from here. Angel Sanchez is the heir apparent, but evidently his power stroke compares more favorably to your sister’s than to Alex Gordon’s. German should be worth a look at short, but that makes way too much sense.

The end of the lineup is easily the worst in the league. Jason LaRue and Berroa’s OPS+ is a respectable 113, when added together. John Buck will be in the mix behind the plate as well, but was only slightly less terrible than LaRue last year.

In one of the most confusing and shortsighted signings of this offseason, Dayton Moore threw $55 million at Gil Meche for league average performance. I wish I could get my salary tripled for being completely average, I think I’ll bring up the case of Gil Meche during my next performance review. For what it’s worth, he’s the “ace,” maybe he’ll find his new title inspirational.

If you’re a chick (doubtful) and you’re ever on plane with Odalis Perez (also highly unlikely) DON’T give him your phone number. There is a story behind that, but maybe Mrs. Odalis reads Dewey’s House and I wouldn’t want to be responsible for any marital difficulties. Let’s just leave it at that. In terms of performance, Odalis also might be league average. When your top two starters have a “solid shot” at an average performance you might want to reevaluate your system.

My sleeper for a breakout season on this squad is Luke Hudson. He’s done a great job at preventing home runs, averaging half a homer every nine innings last year. If he can continue to get his share of groundball outs and keep the ball in the park his .315 BABIP should go down, along with his ERA. The defense (Berroa) behind him has probably hurt him significantly in the past.

The two spots at the end of the rotation are still unclear, but it will be some combination of Zack Grienke, Jorge de la Rosa, Brian Bannister, and eventually 2006 number one overall pick Luke Hochevar. The first two guys on that list are the favorites, as they have the most major league experience, but it will be a trial by fire for the young guys. In KC, even the major league squad is a development team.

After last year’s guy-that-pitched-at-the-end-of-games (I hesitate to call anyone with a S/BS ratio of 18/12 a closer) Ambiorix Burgos was shipped to the Mets for Bannister, Dayton Moore addressed the need in the form of Octavio Dotel. I guess Dotel has a decent chance of coming back, but he certainly won’t be helped by the abuse his arm took with other organizations. Still, it was an uncharacteristically good move at $5 million with valuable bonuses. Dotel will get $200,000 for each five games finished after 15. I’d agree that 20 saves are worth $200k more than 15, and his base salary is right in Joel Pineiro’s tax bracket. After Dotel, Joel Peralta, David Riske, Todd Wellemeyer, and Ken Ray should get the majority of the innings in roughly that order.

The house of David Glass has been on shaky ground lately and this season’s additions won’t prevent the coming disaster. If Hochevar develops as scheduled and Billy Butler and Mitch Maier stay healthy and on track the Royals will have a lot to show for those 100 loss seasons and high draft picks. Right now, everybody’s 0-0, so there’s a little hope. Take solace in the fact that you aren’t the worst team in the league, yet.

Prediction: 65-97

Projected Lineup:
SS Hanley Ramirez
2B Dan Uggla
3B Miguel Cabrera
LF Josh Willingham
1B Mike Jacobs
RF Jeremy Hermida
C Miguel Olivo
CF Alex Sanchez

Projected Rotation:
Dontrelle Willis
Scott Olsen
Anibal Sanchez
Ricky Nolasco
Yusmeiro Petit

Projected Closer:
Henry Owens

Outlook:
It just doesn’t seem fair, does it? 

The Marlins, an expansion team with ugly uniforms and approximately 17 fans, come into the league in 1993, and 4 years later, they are World Champions.  6 years after that, they are World Champions again.  They have seen several Future Hall-of-Famers, 4 no-hitters, 22 playoff wins, and 33 All-Stars.  And then, just when we think they blew the team up, just when we think they will be rebuilding with dozens of green, unprepared rookies and Rule 5 Draft fodder, they shock the baseball world by hanging in the NL Wildcard race into autumn.

And, of course, adding insult to injury for us Sox fans, Hanley Ramirez and Anibal Sanchez both have outstanding rookie campaigns, while Josh Beckett is mediocre in his AL debut.  

The Fish actually should have won more games than they did in 2006, as their Pythagorean record was 80-82.  Looking ahead to 2007, there is good news, and there is bad news.  The good news is that they will be returning almost every key player from 2006, most of whom are young and improving.  The bad news is that one of their best pitchers, 23-year-old RHP Josh Johnson, is expected to miss 2 months with an arm injury.  In light of this, Florida still has a decent rotation at their disposal.  The D-Train, Dontrelle Willis, provides the rotation with a durable anchor, although he is slightly inconsistent.  His 4 year career can be divided into 2 parts: superb Dontrelle, and good Dontrelle.  Given his pedestrian strikeout rate, would say the real Dontrelle is closer to the 2006 version (a durable above-average pitcher) than the 2005 version (a lights-out ace).  Young LHP Scott Olsen has the impressive peripheral stats that indicate a possible future ace.  In his rookie year, after making the jump from AA (like several of these lucky…err…talented bastards), Olsen shined with 166 Ks in 180 innings.  His minor league track record suggests this was no fluke, as he average well over a K per inning before getting the call.  He has excellent stuff and is seemingly durable.  Look for Olsen to take ownership of this rotation over the next few years. 

Anibal Sanchez, of course, brought joy to Miami (and bitterness to Boston) with a no-hitter in September, along with a bunch of other decent performances, posting a 152 ERA+ in his rookie season.  One caveat to note: his stellar 2006 performance was over a half-season.  NL hitters are still getting used to our old Portland Sea Dog friend, and his performances should be expected to normalize a bit in 2007.  I’m not saying he won’t be good, I think he will be a decent pitcher.  Just don’t expect a right-handed version of Johan Santana.  His stuff isn’t that good.  24-year-old Ricky Nolasco was the team’s 5^th starter for the majority of 2006, and actually was a closer candidate heading into spring training.  However, the injury to Josh Johnson forces Nolasco back into the rotation.  Ricky looks to improve upon a year in which he was the weak link of the rotation, giving up a 4.82 ERA and having the highest HR rate on the staff. 

The fifth starter in the rotation has yet to be determined, and the battle is among a handful of guys.  A few weeks ago, I would have assumed Sergio Mitre to be the front runner for the gig, but he is again having issues with injuries.  Yusmeiro Petit, the former Met prospect, was recently very impressive against a powerful Red Sox lineup in spring training. With Mitre hurt, Petit look to have as good of a chance as any of the other candidates.  Wes Obermueller, Jose Garcia, and Chris George round out the competition for the final rotation slot. 

While the Marlins rotation seems young and impressive, the bullpen is just plain young.
With Nolasco moving back to the rotation, the closing duties seemed to be bestowed upon 24-year-old LHP Taylor Tankersley.  Taylor impressed in his MLB debut, with a 2.85 ERA and 46 Ks over 41 innings.  However, Tankersley is reportedly out until mid-April with shoulder inflammation.  This would make rookie Henry Owens, with only 4 career innings pitched at the MLB level (and a career 9.00 ERA) the likely closer to start the year.  Why is he the likely closer, do you ask?  Well, in AA last season, his averaged 16.65 Ks per 9 innings.  That is not a typo.  16.65 Ks per 9 innings.  It will be very interesting to see what this guy can do in the National League.  RHP Matt Lindstrom, who has yet to throw a pitch above AA, is reportedly a dark horse candidate for the closer’s job.  Word on the street is that the righty boasts a 100 MPH fastball and a slider to compliment the heat,  but I can’t conceivably see him winning the role over Owens , not without some kind of injury.

Behind the closer candidates is 24-year-old lefty Reynel Pinto, who was very impressive in a brief sample last season, RHP Kevin Gregg, a “veteran” compared to these other guys (he’s been around for 4 years, and RHP Randy Messenger.

We now move onto what is possibly the most promising young infield in the major leagues, especially the left side.  Franchise player Miguel Cabrera is coming of another great season in which he hit .339/.430/.568, and played solid 3B defense (24 FRAR).  Given his age and his offensive trends, this guy could possibly emerge as baseball’s best player in 2007 (he’s already on the short list with Pujols and A-Rod).  At shortstop is last year’s unlikely Rookie of the Year, old friend Hanley Ramirez.  Should Red Sox fans be upset about this? No.  Hanley and Beckett are now two completely independent entities, and his success has nothing to do with Boston (unless, of course, the Sox happen to be playing Florida).  Anyway, a lot of folks really bemoaned this deal with some 20/20 hindsight, but let me remind all of you: nobody expected Hanley to be this good.  In 2005, in AA, Hanley’s line was this: .271/.335/.385.  Next year, in the major leagues, he improves to .292/.353/.480?  I can’t really fault the Sox for this; it just seems like Hanley had a bit of a fluke season.  Expect a regression for Hanley, with numbers closer to that Portland line.  Speaking of fluke seasons, Dan Uggla etched his name into the records of great Rule 5 picks such as Johan Santana and Roberto Clemente.  The second baseman made the All-Star team and finished third in Rookie of the Year voting, while bashing 27 HRs and slugging .480.  Like his double play partner, expect a slight deflation of what appear to be some overly inflated power numbers.  I would not be surprised to see Mike Jacobs out-produce both Uggla and Ramirez in 2007.  The 26-year-old has some genuine power, with a career slugging percentage of .515.  Backing up the infielders will be Aaron Boone (yes, he’s in Florida now…that pick-up basketball game was more damaging that Chris Webber’s TO in the Final Four) and Alfredo Amezaga.

While the Florida infield has some young, proven talent, the outfield picture is a bit cloudier.  Jeremy Hermida, who was expected to be one of the best rookies in the 2006 class, is looking to improve upon what should probably be called a disappointing season.  He hasn’t lit any fires in spring training, going 0-14 thus far, but we’ll wait until April to pass judgment on the kid. Converted catcher Josh Willingham returns to LF after sharing the team lead in homers with Cabrera.  He’s still learning the ropes in the outfield, as his defense I 2006 was sub-par (-11 FRAR), but he is a legitimate power bat, and will provide some much-needed pop.

Their choices in CF are not exactly appetizing.  The #1 contender, Alex Sanchez, is best known for being the first guy suspended from the revamped MLB steroid policy.  Sanchez did play well in 2005 and in the minors in 2006, and could probably outplay last year’s CF, Reggie Abercrombie.  Abercrombie posted a dismal line of .212/.271/.333 in 2006, which isn’t any better than Cody Ross: .212/.284/.396, or Joe Borchard:  .230/.322/.400.  Eric Reed (.098/.178/.098) is also an option (yikes).  Unless a move is made, the Fish could very well be looking at a festering hole in the middle of their 2007 outfield.  Miguel Olivo and Matt Treanor will handle the catching duties.  Oliva does have some pop, and is a decent defensive catcher, but Treanor does not bring much to the table on either side of the ball. 

While the Marlins have a very promising young lineup, and the layperson might look at this and think: “Gosh, these guys are all going to get better”, I can’t help but predict a massive regression to the mean by Hanley Ramirez and Dan Uggla, and to a lesser extent, Taylor Tankersley and Anibal Sanchez.  However, those regressions will likely be offset by improvement from the likes of Hermida, Olsen, possibly Willis, and (as scary as it is) Miguel Cabrera. 

Expect 3^rd place.

Projection: 79-83

Top 10 Prospects:
Chris Volstad, RHP
Taylor Tankersley, LHP
Sean West, LHP
Reynel Pinto, LHP
Henry Owens, RHP
Matt Lindstrom, RHP
Gaby Hernandez, RHP
Chris Coghlan, 3B
Jose Garcia, RHP
Aaron Thompson, LHP

For the past 15 years, I’ve always talked about doing the whole Spring Training thing.  Usually, it was just idle talk, and I spent March freezing by arse off in Boston, trudging miserably to and fro my cubicle, wishing for an asteroid to land on my head and knock me into sweet, sweet oblivion.  

This year, however, I finally put my credit card where my mouth is, and I am typing this from a Fort Myers hotel. 

Some observations I have, after seeing the Sox play Detroit at the Tigers’ Lakeland complex:

Physically, Dustin Pedroia looks good.  Yeah, he’s still short (I guess he didn’t use the “rack” exercise I suggested last fall), but he is much leaner, much more defined than last year.  However: nothing he has done on the field this spring has impressed me.  He had a tough day today, and he’s had a few tough days thus far.  Take this rant with a huge grain of salt; I’m no scout, and it is only spring training…but he is struggling.

Josh Beckett was fooling guys left and right with his curveball, which he was spotting very well today.  However, he was all over the place with his 97 MPH heater, hitting two guys and throwing behind another.  This caused Todd Jones to throw at JD Drew twice, missing him both times.  Jones was immediately ejected, and both benches cleared.  It might be interesting when these two team lock horns during the regular season.

JD Drew looks to be free and easy in his movements (i.e. he’s not in any pain, at least not that I can see).  He’s been cranking some nice line drives this spring, having two sreaming hits today.  I’m thinking he’s going to make the WEEI crowd backtrack on a few reactionary idiotic statements made after his acquisition.  

The Detroit complex has a nice selection of food and microbrews, and I was able to sneak into the second row on the third base line (I was seated about 10 feet behind DeMarlo Hale) and enjoy my Boddington’s.  I have a feeling I won’t be able to sneak into the second row at City of Palms tomorrow, but we shall see. 

When people from Detroit say “Gary”, it comes out sounding like “Geary”. 

Finally, some advice for anyone venturing down here: wake up very early, if you want to do anything.  If you want to go to the beach, go to breakfast, go to the pool, you need to get up early, because everything tends to get crowded.  Get to the outdoor jacuzzi before the kids wake up and start peeing in it.  Get to the beach before the oldies get up and clog the highways with their white Lexuses.  Florida is best enjoyed before 8 AM.  

Which reminds me, I need to get some sleep.

Our second baseman:

2006 Record: 57-95, 5^th place NL Central

Projected Lineup:
3B Freddy Sanchez
CF Chris Duffy
LF Jason Bay
1B Adam LaRoche
RF Xavier Nady
2B Jose Castillo
C Ronnie Paulino
SS Jack Wilson

Projected Rotation:
Ian Snell
Zach Duke
Paul Maholm
Tom Gorzelanny
Tony Armas

Closer:
Salamon Torres?

Outlook:
We he