BOSTON RED SOX CLINCH FIRST AMERICAN LEAGUE EAST TITLE SINCE 1995

However, as we all know, the real prize still remains unclaimed.

According to Steven Krasner’s excellent blog on projo.com, the Red Sox have decided to play it safe with prized pitching prospect Clay Buchholz, and shut him down for the season.

While this diminishes my dreams of the young hurler ascending to October rookie-hero status in the mold of 1984-1985 Bret Saberhagen, I can’t really argue with this. His innings are well above his career high, and the staff must think it prudent to keep such a powerful weapon off of the postseason roster.

Nice work this year, and we’ll see you in March.

Minnesota 5
Boston 4

Red Sox ace Josh Beckett threw some light BP in an exhibition game against the Twins on Thursday. It was a continuation of “The Mayor’s Cup” held every spring between the two Fort Myers rivals. With the playoffs looming a week away, Josh threw a very relaxed session, letting the Twins’ hitters get some good wood on the ball, and thus giving his fielders some practice.

The Sox offense also held a clinic on “How Not To Score Runs With One Out” in the 9th inning. All in all, it was an all-encompassing practice session which no doubt will prepare the team for their 1st round matchup against Cleveland or Anaheim.

Tonight, the Sox play a real game against Minnesota. A game for which they will be prepared, thanks to last night’s exhibition.

Oakland 6
Boston 11

The Red Sox sweep an emaciated Oakland team in our favorite recent MLB scheduling phenomenon: the 2-game series.

It’s difficult to pick one guy who gets the “game ball” here, as there were several hitters who came up huge. Mike Lowell, as he has been so many times this year, was a monster at the plate. The 21st Century Gray Eagle had 3 hits and 5 RBI, and is now hitting a gaudy .326 on the season, including a 1.006 OPS at Fenway Park this year. (Zach, have you come around on this guy yet?)

A noticably-battered Big Papi also had a big game, as DH David Ortiz pounded three hits, two of which were doubles. Now, much has been said about the alleged “lack of power” Ortiz is experiencing this year…but does said power outage even exist? Let’s compare his Extra Base Hits from 2006 (his career high in SLG% and team record-setting HR year) and 2007.

• Ortiz XBH, 2006: 85 (29 doubles, 2 triples, 55 homers)
• Ortiz XBH, 2007: 84 (50 doubles, 1 triple, 33 homers)

Now, consider the fact that power numbers across the league are down this year, and David’s power outage is looking like more of a myth than a reality.

Manny Ramirez is starting to give me a warm feeling. In my pants. You see, when Manny Ramirez is hitting like Manny Ramirez, the Red Sox are probably the best team in baseball. Manny had 3 hits last night, all singles, but solid hits nonetheless. His timing has been accurate, and he’s been going to the opposite field. Manny is somewhat healthy and hitting somewhat well, and this is terrific news.

The last guy I’ll make note of is Dustin Pedroia, who had 8 total bases and scored 4 runs last night. You can close the ballots and get the camera on Tim Russert for the announcement. The “exit polls” have Dustin Pedroia winning the AL ROY in a landslide.

2

Oakland 3
Boston 7

‘Twas an eventful night. The most notable story from the game was the return of both Manny Ramirez and Kevin Youkilis. Both of these key players on the field was a welcome sight for weary Red Sox fans, as many have been questioning whether or not both players would be ready for the playoffs.

Curt Schilling had yet another good outing, tossing only 86 pitches for his 9th win of the season before calling it an early night. The large opinionated Republican pitcher has been notably more effective in these final stages of the season than he was before his DL break, and appears primed for the Division Series.

• Curt in 2006: 8.07 K/9, 3.97 ERA
• Curt in 2007: 6.02 K/9, 3.87 ERA

Curt appears to be making the transition to finesse pitcher very comfortably (along with being aided by a little bit of BABIP-flavored luck).

It’s time to talk about J.D. Drew again. “The One Who Doesn’t Have Temper Tantrums” is officially on fire, with a 1.008 OPS in the month of September after his three hit performance yesterday. Since the All-Star break, J.D. has had his ups and downs, but overall, his numbers are .276/.370/.434, a respectable .804 OPS. This, factored in with his impressive defensive range and the rough year Trot Nixon is having in Cleveland, leads me to believe that J.D. might be more important to the 2007 Red Sox than some may think.

Oh…and thanks, Dioner.

3

Security will be extra tight in the Boston area for the next couple of days, as Jack Cust arrives in Beantown (along with some other guys who pretend to be his “teammates” or whatever).

A quick Jack Cust scouting report:

• Jack Cust has an OPS of 932.  OPS, in this case, stands for “Other People Slaughtered”.
• Jack Cust was born in Flemington, NJ.  Or, at least, that’s where the meteor crashed from which he emerged.
• Jack Cust does not approve of dog fighting.  He does, however, approve of getting on all fours and biting people to death.
• Jack Cust does not believe in stem-cell research.  He’s already found a cure for Parkinson’s using some combination of whiskey, barbecue sauce, motor oil, and a welding torch.
• Crime has plummeted in Oakland this year.  Coincidentally, Jack Cust is never seen in his hotel room after dark.
• The Challenger explosion was not caused by a faulty O-ring.  The teacher on board once gave Jack Cust an unsatisfactory grade.
• Jack Cust…okay, okay, I’ll stop here.  I know, the whole Chuck Norris/Jack Cust/Bill Brasky joke template is about as original as Dane Cook.

It’s a tense off day.  Cut me some slack, Jack.

Taking two out of three in Tampa Bay is a very welcome occurrence after the disastrous Toronto series, especially while watching Josh Beckett’s 20th win, Eric Gagne’s two scoreless innings, and J.D. Drew finally reaching double digits in HRs.

With the division lead at 1.5 games, let’s take a look at the final scheduled games for the Red Sox and the Yankees (while acknowledging that the division title likely has less actual importance than it does in the eyes of the fans).

The Boston Red Sox

• 9/25 vs Oakland
• 9/26 vs Oakland
• 9/27 vs Minnesota
• 9/28 vs Minnesota
• 9/29 vs Minnesota
• 9/30 vs Minnesota

In that odd two game turn with Oakland, we’ll likely see Chad Gaudin and Joe Blanton, while the Sox send Curt Schilling and Jon Lester to the hill, two guys who have pitched beautifully of late. Oakland, as a team, has been decimated with injuries this season, losing some of their key players for the year. Luckily, the Sox nearly missed Rich Harden’s return, as the fireballer decided recently to call it a season instead of trying to return to the mound.

The great news: it looks like Boston will miraculously play 4 games against the Twins while not facing Johan Santana. The uber-pitcher is scheduled to face Detroit on Wednesday, a day before the Twins arrive in Fenway Park.

The New York Yankees

• 9/24 vs Toronto
• 9/25 @ Tampa Bay
• 9/26 @ Tampa Bay
• 9/27 @ Tampa Bay
• 9/28 @ Baltimore
• 9/29 @ Baltimore
• 9/30 @ Baltimore

The pitching matchup for the game against the Jays is Jesse Litsch vs Andy Pettitte, so Toronto will have their hands full this afternoon. The Red Sox division lead will be either 1 or 2 games at the end of the day, depending on this result.

Tampa Bay is certainly not the pushover we’re used to seeing, going 16-14 in their last 30 games, but even considering this, the smart money has to be on New York taking 2 out of three. The same can be said for their three game tilt in Baltimore.

Although both AL East rivals are playoff-bound regardless of the division standings, 1st place is going to come down to the wire, something we have not seen in quite some time. Every play in every inning for both clubs will matter over the next week. Should be fun to watch, and excruciating at the same time.

Red Sox 1
Blue Jays 6

From the Department of Irrational Optimism: at least there’s time to turn it around.

Red Sox 3
Blue Jays 4

I’ve officially had it with:

• Eric Gagne’s Keith Foulke Impression
• Terry Francona’s blind faith in veterans
• Eric Hinske.
• Red Sox Nation Elections
• Manny’s injury

We can call last night’s edition of the Gagne experiment a huge, steaming pile of failure without a long discourse.  Beyond that, why wasn’t anyone else ready to go?  It was obvious Gagne wasn’t going to get that third out of the inning.  He got two quick ones on Reed Johnson and Alex Rios, two tough hitters, but completely lost control of every pitch after that, missing by four feet at times.  After walking in a run, he barked at Ed Rapuano like a pissy high-school kid.  Dude, its not the Ump’s fault you suck.  It could have been even uglier, the last out came at home plate on a bases loaded double just over J.D. Drew’s glove in right.

This was an important game for the division, but don’t lose sight of what really matters.  I don’t care if this team squeaks in as the wild card or blows everyone out of the water, its all the same come October.  A division win would go a long way to healing the wounded psyche, but I’ll get over it in about 15 seconds if the Red Sox beat the Yankees in the ALCS.  Jon Lester settled down and pitched well after struggling in the first with his control; that’s all I care about right now.  With the rotation struggling, he could be a bigger part of this team in the playoffs than we all realize.

Tonight, Clay Buchholz faces Jesse Litsch (5-9, 4.37, 1.47).  The Sox roster has only faced Litsch 41 times, but is hitting .390/.400/.561.  His last start against the Sox was a short one, 3.1 IP, 7 ER on September 3, but he spread nine hits over 6.2 for 1 ER in July.  Temper your expectations for Clay, if he gives us 6 IP and 3 ER I’ll be happy.  Francona has been quiet regarding how long they’ll leave him out there, citing the usual “A lot depends on how he’s throwing, the score of the game,” but I can’t see him topping 100 pitches under any circumstance.

Red Sox 1
Blue Jays 6

When the lineup card flashed onto my screen, I had a feeling it might be “one of those nights”.

As bad as Varitek has been at the plate, he dwarfs Kevin Cash, who very well might be the worst MLB hitter in my lifetime.  The same can be said for the downgrade of Julio Lugo to Alex Cora.  Lugo has had a decent 2nd half, while Cora’s stock has plummeted.  And then you have Manny Ramirez and Kevin Youkilis out of the lineup.

This, in tandem with an unhealthy Wakefield (back), is a sure-fire recipe for a loss.

The lead in the AL East is down to 3.5 games, and things are getting interesting.  All we can do is hope that Ramirez and Youkilis are set to return soon.  The latest news on Manny, from tonight’s broadcast, is that he might miss another week.

Not good.

New York 4
Boston 3

Last night’s Power Rankings remain unchanged.

The Red Sox lose 2 out of 3 to New York in a series where they outscored the Bombers 20-14, and 18-4 in all innings except the 8th.  In last night’s frustrating finale, the offense was apparently walrus fishing, because they let Roger Clemens and Joba Chamberlain off the hook in numerous big spots.

Clemens did pitch an excellent game, and was aided by some screaming line drives hit directly at fielders and some warning track flies that just didn’t have enough.  The story was similar for Curt Schilling, who threw an excellent game before custom-fitting an 8th-inning gopher ball for Gold Glover Derek Jeter.

The most important news from last night?  Per Manager Terry Francona, we can realistically expect Manny Ramirez back in the lineup on Wednesday.  Switching Ramirez with Eric Hinske gives the offense a slightly different look.

Tonight, it’s Wakefield (16-10, 4.68) against Toronto’s Dustin McGowan (10-9, 4.01), as the Sox travel back to the Toronto Skydome (a park which set a record for going from state-of-the-art to obsolete in a span of about 3 years).

1) Red Sox
Ever since Dan Duquette made the infamous “more days in first place” statement about one of his underperforming Sox teams of the early part of the decade, it has become a punchline of sorts. However, in 2007, the Sox are about to go nearly wire-to-wire in first place, and unlike The Duke’s ill-fated squad, this team will actually finish there. The next week and a half will be their victory lap, as the team looks to prepare the rotation and the regulars for the playoffs.

2) Yankees
Fared well in Boston (while the Sox were missing one of their best hitters). Clearly a team to be reckoned with in October.  Roger Clemens seems to have a knack for inducing screaming line drives directly into his fielders’ gloves.  If he can patent that formula, it might sell for even more than $28 million.
3) Angels
The West is completely sewn up, and the Angels are looking dangerous in a short playoff series, with a formidable 1-2-3 of John Lackey, Kelvim Escobar, and Jered Weaver.

4) Indians
See above, as it is nearly the exact same story. While Boston or New York have to be the favorites to win the American League pennant, these two teams are certainly not going to make things easy with their excellent starting pitching. C.C. Sabathia and Fausto Carmona have easily been the best 1-2 combination in baseball this season.

5) Tigers
Nearly all of the baseball world outside of the Tri-State area will be pulling for Jim Leyland’s squad to overtake New York in the AL Wildcard race. However, the 2.5 game lead isn’t as close as it looks, as the Yankees get to play some cupcakes in their final games. Whatever happens to Detroit in the near future, a tip of the cap goes to Magglio Ordonez and Curtis Granderson, two guys having MVP caliber years (although not close to the year A-Rod is having).

6) Mets
Congrats to Pedro Martinez, as his long rehab road has come to a fruitful end: the former Sox ace now stands at 2-0 with a 1.69 ERA in 16 impressive innings. Perhaps we’ll meet again soon, old friend…?

7) Cubs
All eyes now go to the most interesting story in baseball, the NL Central race. I’m not sure who to pull for here, as both Milwaukee and Chicago are likable in their own way. My gut tells me that Chicago wins the division, as their have the horses in their rotation (by National League standards, anyway).

8) Brewers
Prince Fielder now has a .623 slugging percentage. If he finishes with that gaudy number, he will become the first guy named “Fielder” to have a slugging percentage over .600. Big Daddy never did it, not even in his 50 HR year.

9) Padres
We just might see a Triple Crown winner, as Jake Peavy appears primed to accomplish the pitcher’s version of the feat. He is 1st in the NL in wins (17), Ks (215), and ERA (2.44). It would be a true travesty if this team missed the playoffs at the hands of…

10) Diamondbacks
A true enigma. In first place, this team has a worse Pythagorean record that the last place Giants! The most impressive individual performance on their team has probably been from their closer, Jose Valverde. 60.1 innings, 10.74 K/9, 45 saves, 165 ERA+.

Well, here we are again.

BOS-NYY, Friday, Saturday, Sunday. That old couple who MLB commissions to write the schedule every year (I’m still not sure if they really exist, or are just an urban legend), they seem to enjoy the rivalry more than we do. Both teams are likely to make the playoffs, regardless of the outcome of this series. Boston is basically a postseason lock, while New York would need to have a bad 2-week span to lose out to Detroit, and that doesn’t seem likely based on their recent performance.

Winning the division? It’s a neat little bragging right, and will give a team a minor scheduling advantage in the Division Series. However, as we’ve seen time and time again, the wildcard winners are in essentially the same position to reach the World Series as the division winner. In other words: this is a big series, but maybe not as big as we might think, in the grand scheme of things. Taking it a step further, this series is much bigger for New York than it is for the Red Sox.

Let’s take a look at the pitching matchup:

Tonight: Game 1
Daisuke Matsuzaka (14-12, 4.44) vs Andy Pettitte (13-8, 3.78)
Yikes. If you are a Sox fan, it is impossible to not dread this pitching matchup. In his last 5 starts, Matsuzaka has an ERA of nearly 10. Is there something physically wrong with him? Apparently not, as he is cleared to pitch tonight. Essentially, his command has been for shit. If the Sox are to avoid embarrassment in this game, he will need to straighten himself out. Edge NY.

Saturday: Game 2
Josh Beckett (18-6, 3.27) vs Chien-Ming Wang (18-6, 3.69)
The aces square off in a battle of contrasting pitching styles. You’ll often hear fans claim “I don’t care about the Cy Young Award, it doesn’t matter, why do you care so much, blah blah I’m superior to you blah blah you lowly dog.” Well, I think that’s bullshit. I want Josh Beckett to win the Cy Young award. And notching win #19 on national television against the Yankees will all but clinch it for the voters. Edge Boston.

Sunday: Game 3
Curt Schilling (8-7, 3.93) vs Roger Clemens (6-6, 4.45)
An interesting matchup, to say the least. Clemens hasn’t pitched in 2 weeks since getting lit up by Seattle, and I can guarantee you that the crowd won’t be nearly as civil to him as his last trip to Fenway a few years ago. He has to be considered a question mark right now, especially considering this is the first time IN HIS CAREER he’s had elbow problems. Schilling, noticeably lacking a few MPH on his fastball, has been remarkably steady recently. This includes a start at Yankee Stadium on 8/30. He has had a Quality Start in each of his last 4 outings. Edge Boston.

Devil Rays 4
David Ortiz 5

I listened to those who dismissed clutch hitting ability over the last few years.  I even believed it myself.  After David Ortiz put on a show against Fausto Carmona in July 2006, most of us succumbed to the mountain of evidence.  We haven’t heard much in the clutch department from Mr. Ortiz recently and there were whispers of the old “wisdom,” but, like our new BFF J.D. Drew, he’s simply been waiting to strike.

Down 4-3 for most of the game, the offense had numerous opportunities to scratch that tying run across, but rally killer Varitek has been doing his best Kevin Millar impression over the last three weeks. Since August 21 (22 games), El Capitan is hitting .206 with 26 Ks, 3 XHB and 13 BB.  Three true outcomes is cool, if one of those is over the fence.

The American League offers a new wrinkle to the playoff system this year.  The team with the best record is granted home field advantage and the opportunity to choose a first round schedule of seven or eight days.  Ostensibly, a minor change, but the numerous scenarios complicate things.  The longer schedule gives each team in that series the ability to use their top two starters on regular rest, while the seven game series would require the top guys to go on three days.  It seems like an obvious choice, but there are a variety of factors to consider.  How do your top starters compare to your opponent’s?  Who is better on short rest?  Do you have an advantage at third and fourth starter?  Does your opponent have a history of throwing guys on short rest, which would negate the advantage at the end of the rotation?  Its a tough call, and useless to debate until the Sox know who they are playing.   If this new rule offered the choice of opponent, it would be very interesting.

The Red Sox are off today.  I’ll be watching Ian Kennedy take on A.J. Burnett in Toronto.  Kennedy has a nasty 92mph fastball that runs in on righties, but, big surprise, he struggles with his command.

Devil Rays 10
Red Sox 16

J.D. Drew has us right where he wants us. He’s been coasting since May, hopped up (or down) on opiates to achieve that sought after “Where am I?” persona he exudes with such…lifelessness. Maybe it took a speedy young call up bent on stealing his postseason starts, but a few more 3-4 games and long homers in October will buy him a get out of the doghouse card for seasons past. Turns out, he was biding his time, waiting to snap and explode for 12 straight homers. You heard it here first. That sly dog had us all fooled.

Another shout out goes to Kevin Cash, who contributed the most unlikely of hits last night. No small feat, considering JD had three. If this is all K-Money does for the rest of the season, we can’t be too unhappy. Doug Mirabelli’s remarkable fragility for his limited action doesn’t sting so much any more. Wait, did it ever sting?

And finally, we owe you a big one, Joe Maddon and Andrew Friedman, for utilizing and assembling the least effective group of relievers I’ve seen since John Wasdin was in town. Oh, and you ran through six pitchers last night en route to a crushing defeat. Thanks for the alley-oop.

Tampa Bay 1
Red Sox 0

Please go.

I’m sick of it, just fed up.

Please leave.I don’t want to see the Red Sox face you ever again.

Change leagues. Go to manager Joe Maddon and demand a trade to San Diego. Make sure it’s San Diego, I want you as geographically far away from Fenway Park as possible. Just go.

Leave. Switch positions. Pull a Rick Ankiel. Switch sports. Take up cricket. Here’s an idea: retire! You know what they say: “25 is the new 65″! You must have some dough stashed away. I hear Florida…er…I hear Arizona is beautiful this time of year. Spend time with your family. Just get the hell out of the A.L. East.

Are you hearing me, Scott? I would rather pour liquid nitrogen on my genitals and have Gallagher smash them into pieces with his hammer than watch you face my team for 1 more inning. I would rather have Muhammed Ali and Michael J. Fox perform a dual colonoscopy on me with drumsticks coated in rubbing alcohol.

I just can’t take the feeling of futility. Not only are you left-handed (Kryptonite) but you also have good “stuff”, which makes you all-but-impossible for the Red Sox to beat. Curt Schilling, the Ever Reliable Curt Schilling, guts out 6 strong innings, but they are all for naught, as the Red Sox were facing a true Red Sox killer. In my heart of hearts, I fear, nay, I know that you’ll be on this Tampa Bay team for the foreseeable future, and will continue to face the Red Sox in a hideously unfair large amount of games. And I hate it. I hate myself for hating it. You only weigh 170 lbs, but it is enough to strike fear into the hearts of this Red Sox lineup…and this Red Sox fan.

Scott Kazmir. Red Sox Killer.

Please disappear.

1. Boston Red Sox
Call it homerism, optimism, or insanity — the Red Sox remain in the top spot of our weekly rankings (which need a hipper name than Power Rankings…suggestions welcome) since the week of August 13th. After taking two series from Toronto and Baltimore, I can’t drop them now.

2. New York Yankees
Their only loss last week came against the Mariners on Monday, and Andy Pettitte bounced back from his 120 pitch performance against the Red Sox, although it took him a start to do so. He gave up 11 hits (2 homers) in 6.1 while throwing 119 more against the Devil Rays on September 2nd, but only 2 ER against the Royals Saturday (89 pitches). While A-Rod is their MVP, Pettitte and Wang are a formidable 1-2 in a short series. Knowing Joe Torre, he’ll probably start Clemens and Mussina.

3. Cleveland Indians
They split with the Angels over the weekend, so this should be a tie at third and fourth, but I’m giving the Indians the edge because they fought back to salvage the last two. Fausto and C.C. are still terrifying.

4. Los Angeles Angels
An excellent team, no doubt, but the way the last few weeks are shaping up in the AL, they are my hands-down preference for division series opponent. Everyone is playing well.

5. New York Mets
I guess I have to throw some NL teams in here somewhere. I’d say the Senior Circuit doesn’t have a chance in the World Series, but see Cardinals, 2006, for a reminder that the regular season doesn’t matter. Pedro Martinez’ six shutout innings yesterday are impressive, although I didn’t see any of the game. They’ve won 8 of 9 after being swept by the Phillies to lock down the NL East crown.

6. Arizona Diamonbacks
They beat up on the Padres and Cardinals this week, taking 5 of 6. Jose Valverde has saved four games in a row to bring his league leading season total to 45.

7. Philadelphia Phillies
Giving up 7ER without recording an out is tough on your ERA, just ask J.D. Durbin. The Phils are still in the hunt, two games back of the Padres in the wild card, and a crucial week approaching. They must take three of four from Colorado. I put them ahead of the Padres and Dodgers because they can out slug some of the remaining cupcakes, and now that football season has begun, Phanatics aren’t paying much attention to the Phils.

8. San Diego Padres
Chris Young’s ERA has gone up nearly a run in the last month. Impressive, considering he has 150 innings under his belt and still ranks second in the league behind teammate Peavy. If they hold off the Phillies and Dodgers, and Young figures it out, they’ll be tough to beat.

9. Los Angeles Dodgers
They have the playoffs in their hands this week, just half a game behind the Phillies and hosting the leading Padres beginning Tuesday. If Esteban Loiaza can best Jake Peavy in the opener, look for a very interesting series. Wait, Shea Hillenbrand is on the roster? Nevermind.

10. Detroit Tigers
A dead team walking, or, quivering. They’re four behind the Yankees, and I don’t see them making up even a game of that deficit.

Boston 2
Baltimore 3

A day after a very discouraging start from a struggling Daisuke Matsuzaka, All-Stars Josh Beckett, Hideki Okajima, and Jonathan Papelbon delivered exactly what the fans needed to ease their minds: a smooth 9-inning pitching effort (no walks, 8 hits, and 11 Ks).

Now, Josh Beckett is an obvious Cy Young Award candidate, as he leads the league with 18 wins and is among the league leaders in the other major categories. However, the team has another hurler who should at least be in the conversation for the Cy Young Award: closer Jonathan Papelbon.

The precedent for closers winning the award is there, albeit somewhat flimsy. Only 8 relievers have won the award in the past 30 years: Sparky Lyle, Bruce Sutter, Rollie Fingers, Willie Hernandez, Steve Bedrosian, Mark Davis, Dennis Eckersley, and Eric Gagne. Only Gagne has done it in the past 15 years. Usually, this anomaly occurs when there isn’t a clear starting candidate.

After today’s 2 strikeout save performance, Papelbon is sporting a 1.55 ERA, 13.6 K/9, 5.3 K/9, and is holding hitters to an astounding .137 batting average. J.J. Putz, another reliever having an outstanding season, has a slightly lower ERA, but his peripheral numbers pale in comparison.

Do I think Papelbon will be considered for the award? Alas, no. As you can see, it just doesn’t happen very often these days, especially when there are strong starting candidates. I will say this: with Erik Bedard’s injury and 2 straight losses from Johan Santana, the smart money is currently on Josh Beckett.

Credit due to J.D. Drew: the 2007 Red Sox Whipping Post came through with the go-ahead run today, and had a decent series, reaching base 6 times and scoring 4 runs. Hopefully this will carry over when the Sox hit home on Monday. The pitching matchup is an interesting one: The Omni-Present Scott Kazmir (11-8, 3.79) against Curt Schilling (8-6, 4.04).

This isn’t really a surprise. The FOX Network, in general, detracts from society. There are two redeeming qualities to FOX, both of which are cartoons aired on Sunday nights. The rest of the network is really just a podium for mongolism, and that includes their baseball coverage.

Anyway, for some background, Orioles pitcher Daniel Cabrera threw a 98 MPH fastball behind Dustin Pedroia’s head last night. The reason: he was frustrated that he is a terrible pitcher. That’s it. He was essentially playing the role of Baby Huey, a 6′9″ crybaby who can’t cope with his lack of skill.

Here is Kevin Kennedy’s take:

Kevin Kennedy: “Well, Coco Crisp shouldn’t be jockeying up and down the third base line. That’s why the guy got hit”.

Jeanne Zelasko: “Giggle!” (twirls hair)

First of all, Pedroia didn’t “get hit”. Cabrera missed him, expectedly. Daniel Cabrera has the worst control and poise in the major leagues, and it is no surprise that he, once again, missed his target.

Second, you’re justifying this? Wow. It’s really shocking that no MLB teams have called you with job offers in the past 12 years.

Just a quick clarification, since it’s apparent that ESPN and friends aren’t going to make this clear for you:

Rick Ankiel received HGH in 2004.

Baseball banned HGH in 2005.

That’s it.  It’s a non story, akin to a 19-year-old having a beer before the drinking age was upped to 21.  I guess the headline just looks tastier when you don’t include the facts.