One is a 42-year-old reliever with a 7.06 ERA, pitching for a first-place team which will be making a roster decision very soon. The other is a 24-year-old singer who has more narcotics coursing through her than the shipping lanes between Miami and Columbia.

Winehouse, a favorite on death pools across the western world, was recently hospitalized after fainting.

Timlin, a favorite of hitters on opposing teams, causes me to faint whenever I watch the other team do a conga line around the bases.

The death watch on Mike Timlin’s career continues. As of yesterday, the situation has been downgraded from “fair” to “serious”. After his abomination of a performance last night, allowing the game to get out of reach by yielding 4 runs on 4 hits and 2 walks, hitters are now .322/.396/.522 against the crafty right hander. He walks 1 batter for every strikeout, and his hit rate is at a career high.

Meanwhile, in Lehigh Valley, Daisuke Matsuzaka had a successful rehab start for the Pawtucket Red Sox. Justin Masterson, who has been extremely impressive at the MLB level, is the safest bet to be demoted to make room for Dice-K. The problem is, Masterson would be perfect for Timlin’s role: right-handed late-inning reliever. It would help his development by limiting his innings total while allowing him to gain MLB experience, and it would help the team by improving the bullpen immensely.

It’s a long shot (I’ve discussed Timlin’s sacred cow status before), but the possibility that Timlin soon finds himself the “odd man out” is there. So, which will happen first? Winehouse playing in The Great Gig in the Sky, or Timlin getting the awkward call into Terry Francona’s office? Odds are even money at this point.

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A quick note about the Boston Celtics, who are on the verge of a World Championship with two chances to win one game at home.

They have never lost two consecutive games at home all season.

Here’s hoping they wrap this up tonight.