It’s the annual Dewey’s House Awards Ceremony!  Everybody who’s anybody is showing up for this spectacular event.  Try to elbow your way through the sea of paparazzi and get a front row view of the celebrities.

Oh, look over there!  It’s Milwaukee’s C.C. Sabathia, pulling up to the curb in what appears to be a sail barge.  Yes, I believe that’s the same model used by Jabba The Hutt at the Great Pit of Carkoon.  Uh oh, a white van has pulled up to the carpet.  I think we know who this is…yes, Milton Bradley of the Texas Rangers is stepping out, and he’s escorted by his “handlers”.  Folks, if you know what’s good for you, you’ll aim those flashes elsewhere.  And who’s this over here?  Oh, it’s our own Kevin Youkilis!  Hey, Youk, over here!  Uh oh, he’s not happy.  It looks like he’s complaining about his driver.  Oh, now he’s complaining about the cameras.  Now he’s complaining about his tailor.  Oh jeez, he’s complaining about the texture of the red carpet.  OK, let’s leave him alone and step inside, shall we?

On to the awards.  This is who I believe should win each award, not necessarily who I think will win.

AL MVP Award: Joe Mauer - C/MIN
I guess we’ll end the suspense right away, as this is sure to be a subject of great debate over the next month.  As much as I’d like to see the diminutive second baseman from Boston take home the award, Mauer’s production (.330/.415./454), consistency (his OPS at the All-Star Break was within .004 of his current OPS), and durability (second most American League innings behind the plate) at the most important position on the field cannot be overlooked.

Runner Up:
Dustin Pedroia - 2B/BOS

AL Cy Young Award: Cliff Lee - CLE
Lee gave the baseball world “The Shocker” in 2008, leading the league in wins and ERA for a team which spent a sizable chunk of the season in last place.  He’ll run away with this season’s real Cy Young Award, and rightfully so.  His .880 winning percentage is the highest of the 21st century, the 12th best in MLB history, and the highest since future Hall of Famers Greg Maddux and Randy Johnson in 1995.

Runner Up: Roy Halladay - TOR

AL Rookie of the Year Award: Evan Longoria - 3B/TBR
It wasn’t a spectacular year for rookies in the American League, which is not what we really expected going into the year.  Clay Buchholz and Phil Hughes both sputtered, Joba Chamberlain was injured, and we are left with the lone hitter from the class of highly-touted 2008 prospects.  Longoria missed a bunch of time and played only 122 games on the year, but when he was healthy, he was probably the Rays’ best overall player.  Without Longoria, their streak of futility would still be alive and well.

Runner Up: Mike Aviles - SS/KCR

AL Manager of the Year: Ron Gardenhire - MIN
As mainstream baseball analysis continues to morph into an intellectual pursuit (rather than an emotional one), managers of Gardenhire’s ilk tend to garner less and less appreciation.  Usually, the more stoic skippers, the Franconas, the Torres, the Melvins, they will sop up the praise from contemporary observers.  Gardenhire, however, is a throwback to the times when managers with explosive tempers were the norm rather than the exception.  Whatever his methodology may be, he’s done a terrific job with a team that some thought was destined for the basement of the AL Central this season.

Runner Up: Terry Francona - BOS

AL Comeback Player of the Year - Cliff Lee - P/CLE
Up until 2007, Cliff was your prototypical #3 starter.  Last year, however, he was absolutely horrific, his mere presence on the mound putrefying the air of Jacobs Field.  The 4-year MLB veteran was embarrassingly demoted to AAA in the middle of a division title run.  Lee, however, went from being one of the worst MLB pitchers in 2007 to the best in 2008.  His turnaround embodies the type of performance this award was created for.

Runner Up: Mike Mussina - P/NYY

Next: the National League.  

As we watch the Red Sox unleash the fury of Devern Hansack and Chris Carter upon the Indians and Yankees, I’ll be working on a few things here before the playoffs begin.

• My picks for the awards in each league (CY, MVP, ROY, MOY, CBPOY).
• My end of season Top 20 Prospect List.
• An ALDS Preview.

Stay tuned.

Yes, Jim.  Playoffs.

The Boston Red Sox have clinched a spot in baseball’s post season with a 5-4 victory over the Cleveland Indians.

Is there a more beautiful sight on this God-forsaken planet than Heidi Watney with champagne-drenched hair?  If so, I’d like to see it.

Some breaking news here: the Boston Herald is reporting that the Red Sox will retire Johnny Pesky’s #6 this weekend, most likely on his 89th birthday this Saturday.  Johnny will join an elite and exclusive group of 5 Hall of Fame players on the facade in upper right field:

#1: The best second baseman in Red Sox history.
#4: One of the best player-managers in baseball history.
#8: One of the most durable sluggers in the game’s history.
#9: The best hitter of all time.
#27: One of the best catchers in baseball history.

Johnny Pesky is seemingly a great guy, a war hero, a lifetime Red Sox devotee, and a pretty good MLB player.  That being said, does the whole package translate to a wall-worthy resume?

The entire process will never be perfectly objective.  Johnny Pesky almost certainly deserves a spot over Joe Cronin, but the Cronin mistake should not be used as a benchmark for the wall (just as Tony Perez’s Hall of Fame induction should not be used as a case for Jim Rice). If you were to poll fans today on the possibility of Roger Clemens having his number retired, 90% would be against it, even though he so obviously deserves to be there.  Wade Boggs? Jim Rice?  Dwight Evans?  Fred Lynn? Luis Tiant?  Dom DiMaggio? Mel Parnell?  Dennis Eckersley? Frank Malzone?  All of these gentlemen now have a legitimate argument for having their number retired.

In the end, we just need to accept that emotion is a perfectly acceptable decision factor here.  The right field wall is not the Hall of Fame, and should not be subject to the tight unwritten standard present in Cooperstown.  Johnny Pesky is an 89-year-old man who personifies the long-suffering die hard Red Sox fan.  He’s a soldier, and like all soldiers, he’s made sacrifices and hasn’t really received his fair shake.  This ceremony will immortalize him, and on a very simple level, it will make him happy.

I’m fine with that.

Indians 4
Red Sox 3

Typically, when you hear the common baseball lament “the umpire cost us the game”, it is not meant in the physical sense.  Unfortunately for the Red Sox, umpire Gerry Davis decided to transcend the phrase last night.  What should have been a 2-run double off the bat of Jeff Bailey became an awkward inning-ending force out at third base after Davis failed to elude the bouncing ball.  He froze.  Hey, it happens to lots of people (deer, usually).

I am unfairly picking on Davis here, because the Red Sox managed to leave a total of 12 men on base (only two of which can be attributed to the immobility of the third base umpire) against Zach “Action” Jackson, a pitcher who just oozes AAAA-ness from every orifice.  Jed Lowrie and Mark Kotsay continue to run their own “How To Struggle At The Plate” clinic, as they left more men on the board than an aborted Risk game.

And before I forget: isn’t Kotsay supposed to be…oh, what’s the word…gritty?  Full of heart?  Inclined to sully his uniform with dirt?  Not diving for a ball which lands 3 feet from your cleats would seem to contradict such descriptions.

Alright, enough bile spewing from me this morning.  I’m just more than a little disappointed that the clinch did not happen last night, because the odds are not in favor of it happening tonight either.  The Red Sox face the guy who will be taking home this year’s Cy Young Award and Comeback Player of the Year Award, and they will counter with someone who did not escape the third inning in his last start.

While the champagne should still be kept at a cool temperature in an accessible location, perhaps a crate of Peptol Bismol should be positioned within reach for tonight’s game.

Oh, what might have been.  Had the last place Baltimore Orioles managed an unlikely victory with the world watching, sullying the raucous, heartfelt Yankee Stadium celebration by making a post-season denial a mathematical certainty, it would have been a night to remember.  The 2 million pound elephant sitting quietly in Monument Park would have been impossible for the ESPN talking heads to ignore.  As expected, Chris Waters (yes, there’s a Major League pitcher by the name of Chris Waters.  Now you know.) and the 50-legged septic tank that is Baltimore wilted under the national spotlight, and my ravenous appetite for schadenfreude was not sated.  I suppose wishing for such a thing speaks volumes about me as a human being.  Some Red Sox fans have managed to shed their bitterness and angst like snake skin, but not this one.

The silver lining is that we’ll probably see the Red Sox celebrate a playoff berth in front of 40,000 fans at their house, and it’s likely to happen tonight against a floundering Cleveland Indians squad.  Why will it happen tonight?  Tonight’s pitching matchup:

Josh Beckett vs. Zach Jackson

Since coming back from injury, Beckett has been nearly untouchable, pitching 19 innings and only giving up 2 runs.  He has 21 Ks to go with only 3 BBs and 1 HR.  On the other hand, Zach “Action” Jackson has a combined 6.64 ERA in the minor leagues this season, to go with his 6.35 Major League ERA.  In other words, the plastic wall coverings, the champagne goggles, and the copious amounts of booze, they are all being carted into 4 Yawkey Way as we speak.

It’s time to give the 2008 regular season a flying elbow off the top rope.

Red Sox 3
Rays 10

Tropicana Field.  A convoluted mess of concrete, canvas, and steel.  The horribly deformed 10-year-old child of Major League Baseball.  You can see the years of pathetic futility and apathy infused in the off-white ceiling, like stains from prolonged cigarette use.  Yet, the 2008 Boston Red Sox, the Defending World Champions, will walk away from St. Petersburg’s puss-filled whitehead with just 1 win in 9 games.

The most frustrating aspect of the entire regular season see-saw between Boston and Tampa Bay?  In my (hopefully) objective opinion, Boston has the better baseball team.  Tampa might have a “sexier” team; they’re younger, they run faster, and they’re the feel-good story of baseball.  But, the Red Sox have a stronger offense, and (this is open to debate) a better pitching staff.

In head-to-head match ups, however, the Rays simply got the job done, while the Olde Towne Team wilted.  This includes some guys who you’d normally expect to rise to a higher level against a divisional rival such as Tampa Bay.  For instance…

Against the 2008 Tampa Bay Rays:

• David Ortiz hit .212/.278/.424
• Kevin Youkilis hit .133/.233/.300 at Tropicana Field
• Manny Ramirez (while he was here) hit .200/.308/.311
• Mike Lowell hit .245./298/.472
• Tim Wakefield has a 5.87 ERA

Hey, my hat goes off to the Rays.  What they’ve done this season is amazing, and they deserve to be the story of baseball.  It’s a shame that they don’t have much of a fan base (no offense to those who actually do support them), and they play in such a hideous venue.  This fledgling team went toe-to-toe with the imposing Boston Red Sox and their army of travelling white-collar drunkard fans, stared them down, and outfought them.  With only 10 games to play, it looks unlikely that the Red Sox will repeat as Division Champions, and this is all thanks to Tampa Bay.

The Red Sox should breeze into the American League playoffs via the wildcard.  And with that, there is a chance I shall be served my favorite meal this October.  A dish called “revenge”.

NOTES:

• Mike Lowell was out last night, and an MRI of his labrum is being analyzed by his specialist today.  We’ll see what comes of it.
• Coming up next: I’ll tell you why Daisuke Matsuzaka will be getting a ~4 million dollar raise after this season.

Red Sox 13
Tampa Bay 5

In a cruel twist of fate, the most critical game of Scott Kazmir’s 5-year career turned out to be the worst performance of his career.

The hard-throwing lefty, known for giving the Red Sox more fits than an epileptic child after playing 20 straight hours of Grand Theft Auto, gave up 9 earned runs in only 3 innings, including 4 walks and 4 home runs.  It is, by far, the worst Major League outing ever for the formidable pitcher.

While the Sox were able to explode for 9 extra base hits (6 HR, 3 2B), let’s not overlook the performance from Daisuke Matsuzaka, who simply hasn’t received enough praise for the season he is having.  His approach is frustrating to some; “walking guys” is the bane of most traditional baseball fans.  My belief is that most fans consider a walk to be the result of a mental burp, something that could just be avoided if the pitcher “woke up” or “had balls” or whatever.  In Daisuke’s case, these walks should be considered a tax, or overhead.  They are an expense to Daisuke for doing his business outside of the strike zone.  He’d like to limit them (as he did last night), but sometimes they will happen.  While the walks are unfortunate, they can be tolerated when opponents are hitting .214.

Should Matsuzaka change his approach?  A quick look at his numbers in 2008 should answer that question resoundingly.

NOTES:

• With Jason Varitek’s 158th career home run, he passes Hall of Famer Carlton Fisk for most taters by a catcher in a Red Sox uniform.  Sure, the guy might be overrated around these parts, but he’s put together a fine career.
• RIP Richard Wright, the keyboardist of Pink Floyd.  Wright dies way too young at 65, and the quality of rock music continues to deteriorate.  Wright’s work on the synthesizer put me to sleep many a night, and accompanied me on many a drive.  The grass was greener…

Blue Jays 3
Red Sox 4

The 2008 chapter of Jon Lester’s pitching career might as well be entitled “Proving Everyone Wrong”.  Well, maybe everyone except for one guy.  Shameless plugs notwithstanding, even my lofty prediction of a 4.27 ERA over 179 innings has been eclipsed in grand fashion.

 You’ve likely grown tired of my constant bleating about improved control being the key to Lester’s success this year.  However, another factor to consider: not where Lester is throwing, but what Lester is throwing.  You see this photo to the left here?  This is a masterpiece (courtesy of Brooks Baseball, MPH is the X-axis, break in inches is the Y-axis) worthy of the Guggenheim.  A luscious cornucopia of blistering fastballs touching 97 MPH, bat-splintering two-seamers, mystifying changeups, and neck-twisting curveballs.  As long as Lester can accruately command this vast arsenal, a batter can never “cheat” (so to speak).

For instance, look at Jonathan Papelbon, a guy who yielded two earned runs in the 9th inning.  Hitters will always cheat when facing Papelbon, because 1) 90% of his pitches are fastballs in the 95-98 MPH range, and 2) he has yet to figure out the split-fingered fastball.  Now, Papebon’s heater is among the toughest pitches in baseball, and he will survive on most nights, even while knowing that hitters are using the timing factor to their advantage.

With Lester, the opposing batters do not have the stop-watch available in their tool kit.  A myriad of pitches could await them, and the guessing-game isn’t smart money at 1/4 odds.

Now, on to another subject, one I’m sure I bitch about fairly often, and will continue to bemoan as long as the practice is continued.  Bringing the team’s best reliever into the 9th inning with a 3-run lead is one of the primary examples of existing baseball groupthink.  As a general rule, if there is a pitcher in whom you have less than 95% confidence that they can throw 1 inning without giving up 3 runs, they should not be on your team.  It really is that simple.  In that situation, Terry Francona should be able to call upon the stuffed boar head on the living room wall of Mike Timlin’s house.

Instead, we head to Tampa Bay with our best relief pitcher most likely inactive for game 1.  Hopefully, he won’t even be needed, but it’s not an ideal spot for the Red Sox.

Blue Jays 0
Red Sox 7

Could 9/12/08 have been the best regular season start of Tim Wakefield’s long and illustrious Red Sox career?  I’m speaking in context, of course; Wakefield has had some near misses on no-hitters and a smattering of complete game shutouts throughout his tenure in Boston.  Those outings would surely have a higher game score than Wakefield’s effort last night.  Tonight, however, Wakefield gave the Red Sox exactly what they needed at an extremely critical time of the season.  And let’s be frank: we weren’t exactly expecting a gem from Wakefield after his previous start: a 1.2 inning abomination in Texas.

How big was Wakefield’s performance last night?  Well, the Red Sox are currently 2.5 games behind the Tampa Bay Rays in the divisional race, and 5.5 games ahead of the Minnesota Twins in the wildcard race.  There are 17 games left in the regular season.  The Red Sox have a daunting double header scheduled for today against the pesky Toronto Blue Jays, and the scheduled starters are Paul Byrd (averages about 6 innings per start) and Bartolo Colon (first start since June 16th, averages about 6 innings per start).  In other words, the team will likely need 6 innings of relief today, and that is a conservative estimate.  On top of all of this, when the Red Sox finish with Toronto, they leave for Tampa Bay in what appears to be the most critical series of the 2008 season.  Having a fresh bullpen in Tropicana Field would be ideal.

Wakefield’s 8 innings effort, limiting the bullpen usage to 1 inning from Manny Delcarmen, should be one to remember.

Rays 5
Red Sox 4

Don’t get me wrong, I realize that there have been games where the team has played worse than this.  But, as far as broken expectations, lost momentum, and soaring frustration levels go, this game is likely the biggest kick in the teeth thus far.

We knew this matchup would be the tricky one of the series, with the Sox facing hard-throwing lefty Scott Kazmir, and our own pitcher looking a bit shaky of late.  What we did not expect is a loss after heading to the 9th with a 1 run lead.  Let’s face facts: if that Large Hadron Collider does indeed cause Armageddon this morning (and I’m pretty sure it will), the final MLB standings would show the freaking Rays in first place in the American League East.  When Earth is finally deemed habitable again 100,000 years from now, whichever space-faring civilization finds yesterday’s box score beneath the heaping mass of rubble and fossilized humans will utter “WTF? I thought the Rays sucked?”.

Should we be worried about Jonathan Papelbon? Not really.  Admittedly, he has not been as dominant as he was earlier in the season, something that could perhaps be attributed to fatigue.  On the other hand, what do you really expect from an elite MLB closer?  Let’s say our benchmark for MLB excellence in relief pitching is Mariano Rivera’s career ERA (and that is probably a lofty goal).  In 14 seasons, #42 has compiled an ERA of 2.29.  What does this mean?  In a season of 70 innings (typical of the modern day closer), a pitcher with a 2.29 ERA could allow 1 run in 17 of those 60 innings.  He could have 4 innings where he allows 1 run, 5 innings where he allows 2 runs, and 1 inning where he allows 3 runs.

Even the elite closers sometimes have a rough night or two, or six.  This one came an an especially excruciating moment, and the Red Sox will be forced to wait at least another few days before reclaiming their spot atop the American League East.

I’ve avoided writing anything football related thus far, since the 2008 Boston Red Sox are currently looking like a legitimate threat to repeat as World Champions and deserve the full attention of my pen.  However, I’ll briefly touch on a small firestorm created by reactions to Tom Brady’s season-ending injury.

Semi-retired Red Sox pitcher Curt Shilling, surprisingly willing to discuss his thoughts to the media this afternoon, lashed out at fans (Yankee fans in particular) for celebrating Brady’s injury.  Curt’s comments were on Boston radio station WEEI, but were predictably picked up by the rabbit-eared New York Post (the Hank Steinbrenner of newspapers).  According to Schilling:

“The euphoria in New York is palpable,”…”The Yankees suck this year and they are bitter and mad and making excuses over that. Now they got Tom going down so New York’s excited. It’s unfortunate, but when you crawl to the top of the pile you will have people trying to knock you down.”

Now, with all due respect to Curt, much of the euphoria over Brady’s knee is coming from places all over the country, not just the pinstriped faction of the sports world.  Buffalo, Indianapolis, San Diego, just about anyplace where you can freely buy alcohol on Sunday is in celebration mode.  Check out any national sports website, and you will see comments that turn your stomach.  This is no surprise; the sickening Lord of the Flies pocket of human nature shines though nowhere better than the anonymous shroud of the internet, where the tormented weaklings among us can finally lash out at society with no consequence.

Now, if you ask me, applauding a career-threatening injury to a superstar athlete is the first chapter in the book titled “How To Act Like a Mouthbreathing Douche”.  Hypothetically speaking, what if Michael Jordan had torn his ACL during the Chicago Bulls dynasty of the mid 90’s?  As a teenage Celtics fan, would I have applauded?  I’m admittedly not sure, but I sure as hell hope not.  What if Wayne Gretzky has severed his carotid artery on an opponent’s ice skate?  Would I have raised my arms triumphantly?  Probably not, because I don’t give a shit about hockey, but you get the idea.

My point is, I’m actually happy about the reaction.  The pure unrefined hatred, the bitterness, the caustic bile being spewed at New England from places I never knew existed.  It’s human nature to hate those who possess what you covet.  We possess two teams that are dominating the 2 major American sports, and heavy lies the crown.  At this point, Boston fans should be like Emperor Palpatine: feeding off of these vile emotions, allowing them to sustain us and make us whole.  Curt, buddy?  Listen to Neil Young: don’t let it bring you down.  Revel in it, as I am.

Thank you, rest of America.

It’s a surprisingly unique manifestation of September pennant race baseball.  The Tampa Bay Rays, formerly known as the Devil Rays, Devil Dogs, Devil RAAAys, among other unflattering monikers, have finally seen their years of high draft picks come to fruition on the major league team.  Unbelievably, they are now the team to beat in the AL East.

The next three games will be the most important of the Red Sox season to date.  However, they will be the most important to date in Tampa Bay’s entire franchise history.  They have been losing games and losing ground to Boston at a frantic pace, and will be backed into a corner while visiting a hostile Fenway Park this week.  How will Joe Maddon’s kids react to this new territory?

Let’s break it down, position by position.

Game 1 Starters
Edwin Jackson vs. Jon Lester
Edwin was cuffed around in his last start against the floundering Yankees, and he is two innings shy of his career high of 161.  The hard-throwing youngster, who has had injury issues in the past, could be experiencing some fatigue.  According to Pitch FX, his maximum fastball speed against the Yankees was 95.6, compared to 97.4 in his best start against the Red Sox in April.  Jon Lester has been terrific against Tampa Bay this season, with a 1.46 ERA in 2 starts.

Advantage: Boston

Game 2 Starters
Scott Kazmir vs. Daisuke Matsuzaka
You all know the story with Kazmir.  110 career innings against Boston.  A 3.02 ERA, and 126 Ks.  Surprisingly, Boston has handled him just fine this year (albeit in only 2 starts).  His Achilles’ Heel has been an occasional lack of control, and the Red Sox are a team who will exploit that.  Still, he is in the midst of another terrific season, he has not been scored upon in his last 2 starts, and he gets the benefit of the doubt here.  Especially considering how lost Matsuzaka appeared in his last “quality start”.

Advantage: Tampa Bay

Game 3 Starters
Andy Sonnanstine vs. Josh Beckett
Red Sox fans across the country watched Beckett with their fingers crossed last week, and a collective sigh of relief was heard when he left the game after 5 shutout innings in the driving range known as Ameriquest Field.  His velocity was down quite a bit (average fastball speed was 92.45) but his command was impeccable and he managed to snap off 16 curveballs.  If he is close to the same pitcher we saw in Texas, the Rays will have their work cut out for them.  Sonnanstine has a 5.31 ERA in his last 10 starts.

Advantage: Boston

Catcher
Dioner Navarro vs. Jason Varitek
One could argue that Dioner’s emergence has been the biggest reason for the Rays’ success in 2008.  Offensively and defensively, he’s been among the top handful of catchers in the American League.  Varitek has been playing just fine of late, and on Friday, he actually had his batting average at .230 for the first time since late June.  Tampa Bay leads the league with 132 stolen bases, and will be testing Varitek’s arm this week.  It could get ugly, as he has only thrown out 23% of potential larcenists.

Advantage: Tampa Bay

First Base
Carlos Pena vs. Kevin Youkilis
Pena, the Northeastern Alum, has a 1.027 OPS since the trading deadline, and is having an Adam Dunn-esque “Three True Outcomes” type of season.  (The three true outcomes refer to a K, a BB, and a HR.  Pena has accumulated a shitload of all three this year).  As scary as Pena is at the plate these days, Youkilis continues to trudge forward in what is a breakout season for him, and has made the loss of Manny Ramirez somwhat palatable.

Advantage: Red Sox

Second Base
Akinori Iwamura vs. Dustin Pedroia
Dustin who?  He struggled a bit in the Texas series (2 for 11 with 3 walks and zero strikeouts), but he’s probably the favorite to win the American League MVP Award as of this afternoon.

Strong Advantage: Boston

Third Base
Willy Aybar (Evan Longoria?) vs. Mike Lowell
If Evan Longoria had not suffered an injury August, the Rays would have likely wrapped up the division title by now.  Most of Longoria’s playing time has gone to Willy Aybar, who hasn’t produced nearly as much as the highly-touted rookie.  There is a slim chance Longoria could return this week, but it’s doubtful.  Lowell has been on a tear since retuning from injury last week, and should be well rested after getting a day off yesterday.

Advantage: Boston

Shortstop
Jason Bartlett vs. Jed Lowrie
The traditional knock on Lowrie from those familiar with him in the minor leagues was that his SS defense was suspect.  But, in his limited time starting at SS for Boston, his Revised Zone Rating and the rate at which he makes Out of Zone Plays are both higher than those of Jason Bartlett, a guy who has been lauded for his defensive prowess.  I’m not saying that Lowrie is actually the better fielder, but I’ll contend that he’s probably a little better than we expected.  His offense gives him the advantage in this matchup.

Slight Advantage: Boston

Outfield
Hinske/Upton/Gross/Perez vs. Bay/Crisp/Ellsbury/Kotsay
The Rays’ outfield looks much different without the electric Carl Crawford, who is out until the final week of the regular season.  Eric Hisnke, after jumping to a rabbit pace earlier this season and making Red SOx fans pull their hair out in angst, has regressed predictably.  Upton, the best of the bunch, is having a relatively down year, and Gross & Perez are pretty average.  As weak as the S0x outfield might be without J.D. Drew, they have an advantage over Tampa Bay both in the field and at the plate.

Designated Hitter
Floyd/Baldelli vs. David Ortiz
Look, I’m the biggest Rocco Baldelli fan you’ll find outside of Central Florida, and I’m pulling for him.  But, the combo of Rocco and Cliff Floyd (who I believe is technically some sort of plant-eating dinosaur) doesn’t match up to His Papiness.  Even with his wrist “clicking”.

Advantage: Red Sox

Bullpen
Troy Percival?  Hey Tampa: The 2002 version of Jimmy called, he wants his fantasy closer back.

Advantage: Red Sox

Overall
The Rays are simply not the same team without Carl Crawford and Evan Longoria, and will be in serious trouble this post-season if both of these guys are not back in their usual form.  Expect this team to back into the playoffs.

Prediction: Red Sox will sweep.

I knew the show existed, and I knew it wasn’t something I’d normally watch.  But, was “Sox Appeal” really that bad?  At long last, this agonizing question has been answered.

The Red Sox had just finished off the Texas Rangers to wrap up the season series between the two teams.  Boston had dominated the heavy hitters from the Lone Star State all season, and I had just opened up my laptop to post my thoughts.  NESN was on TV behind me, and the post-game show was just ending.  I really wasn’t paying attention.

On comes “Sox Appeal”, one of the newfangled NESN products aimed at the growing demographic of 16-25 year-old Sox fans who aren’t really into baseball (as odd as that sounds).  There’s a popular term used frequently to describe these folks nowadays: Pink Hats.  The term itself is a little flawed, since it is aimed solely at the female denizens of Red Sox Nation, when in actuality there are also a large amount of males who are into the Fenway “scene” and not the game itself.  Fenway Park is basically the world’s largest and most expensive singles bar.  But, I digress.

As soon as I overheard the first 30 seconds of this television program, I puked blood all over my computer screen and went into convulsions.  As New Englanders, do we really want to embrace the image of the uneducated, Bud Light swigging, grammatically impaired townie?  Why else would they have that insufferable “cab driver” from the Olympia Sports commercials narrating the show? Is this what the program directors at NESN really think of their viewers?  I honestly can’t dedicate any more time to writing about the show, because each second I spend contemplating it makes me want to tear out my gonads and feed them to a garter snake.

Well, I’m off to spend 36 hours in a psych ward, because I can’t stop washing my hands.  Thanks, NESN.  Hopefully, I’ll be well enough on Monday afternoon to write a preview of the ultra-important series against Tampa Bay.  Stay tuned.

In yet another move towards the complete NFL-ization of Major League Baseball, we now have Instant Replay to aid the umpiring of home runs in our national pastime. In last night’s Yankees-Rays matchup at Tropicana Field, the technology was used for the first time in Major League history. It took the umpiring crew a little over 2 minutes to confirm that Alex Rodriguez’s towering left field blast was indeed his 549th career home run.

According to the opinion of MLB executive Jimmie Lee Solomon, the emergence of instant replay is akin to the second coming of Christ: “It was flawless. Everything went the way it was supposed to go.” Hell, even the Rays, the guys who were on the wrong end of the call in question, were singing the praises of baseball’s newest wrinkle.

Now, I’m not some crotchety purist, pining for the days of sepia-toned baseball cards and wool uniforms. There are zero Norman Rockwell paintings hanging in my domicile, and I freely acknowledge that Randy Johnson threw harder than Smokey Joe Wood. However, I’m not sure instant replay is good for baseball.

1) One of the biggest reasons baseball is losing young fans to other sports in the slow pace of the game. Last night, the instant replay process lasted 2 minutes and 15 seconds, and that is not counting the discussion time before the process, nor does it include the time it took for the players to settle in and resume play after the final decision had been made. You could argue that the process tacked roughly 5 minutes onto the total length of the game. While 5 minutes doesn’t seem like an eternity on paper, it certainly won’t help the image of a sport which is often criticized for its grating periods of inactivity.

2) This will come off as sophomoric and idiotic (and perhaps it is), but I really do enjoy watching managers and umpires argue. I wanted Joe Maddon to make a spectacle of himself on the field, with his Dennis Hopper mug and his coke bottle glasses. I wanted the umpire to calmly observe Maddon’s crazy rant for 30 seconds, and once Maddon utters one of the “Magic Words”, give the crowd a WWF-like exaggerated arm motion and scream “YOU’RRRRRRRE OUTTA HERE!”. It would have amused me, plain and simple. Isn’t that our primary goal when we tune into baseball games? To be amused? To have some God forsaken robot become the final arbiter between the managers and the men in blue, well…that just sucks the spirit right out of arguments.

You know what? While reading over my two reasons above, I now recognize and admit that #2 concerns me much more than #1, which makes my entire stance pretty trivial and weak. In other words, maybe this is just a purist ranting. In the end, I’m just another guy in the bleachers, covered in peanut shells and kicking around my 6 empty plastic cups. I appreciate the umpires “getting it right”, but I also enjoy watching explosions from time to time.

Sue me.

Orioles 4
Red Sox 5

The opening scenes were carbon-copied from a script we’ve read many times before: the one which ends with us slamming our television remotes against the wall in disgust, shamefully trudging into a dark windowless room, stripping down naked, and flogging ourselves with bamboo poles until our bodies are covered with blistery welts.  Welts which purify our souls, and allow us us forget the pain of witnessing a tough Red Sox loss.  What?  You’re saying you don’t handle losses this way?  Well, don’t judge me, pal.

How did the Red Sox win this game?  This game had all the makings of a severe letdown: day game before an off day, facing sub-par pitchers on a sub-par team, watching a shaky Daisuke Matsuzaka give banjo hitters a free tour around the bases, watching the likes of David Ortiz and Jason Bay helplessly flail at balls they would normally crush with the strength of a dozen rabid oxen, among other things.  I have to say that this victory was a bit of a donation from the Orioles preferred charity of 2008: The Embarrassingly Terrible Baseball Foundation.  Baltimore really had us by the short-and-curlies today, but thanks to a flurry of walks and poor plays in the later innings, the tide turned and the Orioles found themselves swept.

On that note, Baltimore, I say to you: good f*%&ing riddance.  Leave this realm, and don’t come back until 2009.  You were the worst team in the AL East by a fair margin, and yet, nearly every game against you was difficult to watch in some way or another.  If I never see Brian Roberts playing at Fenway Park again, it will be the greatest gift ever bestowed upon me from the gods (including the births of my future children).  The day he retires will become a holiday in my home.  We’ll exchange gifts.  We’ll have antipasto.  We’ll drink and say things we regret.  It’s the most wonderful time of the year!

NOTES:

• In addition to Lowell and Beckett, first baseman Sean Casey should also return on Friday.
• The above means less at-bats for Alex Cora.  As much as I’ve bashed him, the elephant in the corner is that he’s had a terrific season at the plate (in limited time).  Unsustainable and lucky?  Sure, but good nonetheless.
• The Red Sox tied Cleveland’s mark of consecutive sellouts with 455, and are a lock to break that record when they take on Tampa Bay on Monday.
• The weather is nice and it’s September 3rd, which means the co-eds are back in town.  In other words: GOD DAMN.  Those of you near the trolley stretch of Commonwealth Ave know of what I speak.

Orioles 2
Red Sox 14

Like a neighborhood cat terrorizing a family of helpless field mice, The defending champion Red Sox are taking full advantage of this series against the last place Baltimore Orioles. They don’t exactly have bragging rights here, since the two starting pitchers Baltimore has thrown into the fire have a combined ERA of 7.00 in 174.2 innings, but they’ve been doing what they are supposed to be doing: humiliating weak pitchers at Fenway Park.

Now, you know about Dustin Pedroia and David Ortiz, two guys who had a huge night once again. But, there’s another guy who has been hitting extremely well and flying under the radar while doing it: Jason Varitek. Since August 16th, Varitek is hitting .326/.408/.651 in 49 plate appearances, and is a major reason why the Sox have remained in control of the wildcard despite injuries to J.D. Drew and Mike Lowell.

(Jeff’s piece on Varitek is worth a read. Check it out here).

NOTES:

• Kevin Youkilis did not play last night (back spasms) and is “50/50″ for tonight.
• Josh Beckett’s side session went well, and all systems are go for Friday.
• Today’s game is at 1:35 pm - plan accordingly.
• If the Red Sox do sweep, I will try not to make any references to “The Wire”.  Being a 30-year-old white liberal, this promise will be difficult to keep.

I’m listening to our local sports radio station, WEEI 850 (God help me), and one of the panel members on the 2-6 pm show offered the following analysis of Red Sox pitcher Josh Beckett (I’m paraphrasing):

“…Beckett is their secret weapon down the stretch.  Because, regardless of what he’s done in the regular season, you know exactly what you are going to get from him in the playoffs…”

Just to clarify, Josh Beckett, a pitcher who is returning from a debilitating elbow affliction this Friday, a guy who has a 7.25 ERA in his last 4 starts, will be just fine in October.  Because, it’s October, and in October Josh Beckett rises to the October occasion and comes through in October.   October October October Beckett October Big Game October October October October October.

Look, I acknowledge that we’ve seen some amazing athletic performances in the various post-seasons this city has witnessed in the past 8 years.  I also acknowledge Beckett’s impressive playoff track record, and I sincerely hope he is healthy when (if) the Red Sox begin post-season play this year.   It just boggles my mind that people expect players like Beckett to turn on a switch and go into “October Mode”.

Expecting 1.73 ERA playoff ball from Beckett is simply unfair.  Let’s keep our sense of entitlement in check, shall we?

Despite their impressive 9-4 stretch over the past 13 games, the Red Sox have not been operating at full capacity. They’ve received some help from the unlikely sources of Alex Cora, Mark Kotsay, and even Michael Bowden. As a result of some surprisingly good play from these supporting cast members, the Sox have managed to hold their ground in the wild card race.

As of today, the team is missing three of their key players: Mike Lowell, J.D. Drew, and Josh Beckett. What’s the scoop on these guys?

• Mike Lowell (strained oblique): Has taken swings in the cage and in regular batting practice, and reportedly feels good. Thinks he should be ready to play on Friday.
• Josh Beckett (elbow): His elbow appears to be fine, and he’ll start on Friday, albeit with a tight leash.
• J.D. Drew (back): Here the news isn’t as good. He’s taking indoor batting practice, and is eligible to come off the DL today, but he isn’t ready yet. The Sox and Drew are being rather Belichick-esque on this one (i.e. not much information is available).

It was the typical Paul Byrd performance, and exactly what the Red Sox were expecting when they decided to acquire the journeyman right-hander.

7 innings. Only 1 walk, but 7 hits (including 3 home runs) allowed. 4 earned runs. A win.

It’s not pretty, and it sure as hell isn’t much fun to watch, but for a team that averages 6.32 runs on offense since the July 31 acquisition of Jason Bay, it does the trick more often than not. With the status of Josh Beckett and Tim Wakefield up in the air, Byrd’s importance to the team is much greater than we originally anticipated.

Let’s shift gears, and talk about our second baseman for a moment. Dustin Pedroia had another big night, with 2 hits, 2 RBI, a walk, and a run scored. He’s now hitting .327/.374/.488 on the year, good enough for a 122 OPS+. He’s been among the top second basemen in the league defensively (currently third in RZR). He’s also quietly become one of the best base stealers on the team, with 17 swipes in 18 attempts.

He now leads the league in batting average, hits, runs scored, and is a bona fide MVP candidate as of this morning. Would I vote for him? Probably not. But, I’m not a member of the BBWAA (at least not yet! Am I right? Sigh…). Now, Dustin Pedroia has been the local media’s golden child since his MLB debut, for a variety of reasons. If you’re not sure what I’m talking about, check out any of FJM’s articles on David Eckstein, and you’ll get the general idea. Let’s just say that Pedroia fits a certain profile.

Given his physical characteristics, his typically low-offense yielding position, and his nifty glove work and base running, capturing an American League batting title could very well earn Dustin the league’s highest honor.